[Lizzie B]

Everytime I date a so called "normal person" I put myself down i.e. joke about my issues etc. Last time recently the person started taking advantage of me financially and I just took it for a long time. Because, I didn't think anyone could really love me. Help or suggestions please.

[Leed]

I'm not sure I understand. Why would you let someone take advantage of you financially if you didn't think they liked you? If you felt they didn't care for you, it should be EASY to refuse them money. Are you afraid to say no? Are you afraid that if you do they WON'T like you? If that's the case, they aren't worth your trouble in the first place. And any man worth his weight isn't GOING to ask you for money! That's just plain a lousy thing to do! That's taking advantage of the relationship. If a guy starts asking for money, that's a clue to say goodbye.

You don't need to joke about your issues. I'm sure you're a perfectly nice gal who isn't any more "messed up" than anyone else. Everyone has "issues" so don't worry about it. Just try to relax and enjoy yourself. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee

[Perna]

Make friends with yourself first and quit putting yourself down before engaging others and trying to have a relationship. If your relationship with yourself is not 100%, it's almost impossible to have a good relationship with another person, even if they are fine with themselves (which is all "normal" is).

[Lizzie B]

Originally Posted by Leed

I'm not sure I understand. Why would you let someone take advantage of you financially if you didn't think they liked you? If you felt they didn't care for you, it should be EASY to refuse them money. Are you afraid to say no? Are you afraid that if you do they WON'T like you? If that's the case, they aren't worth your trouble in the first place. And any man worth his weight isn't GOING to ask you for money! That's just plain a lousy thing to do! That's taking advantage of the relationship. If a guy starts asking for money, that's a clue to say goodbye.

You don't need to joke about your issues. I'm sure you're a perfectly nice gal who isn't any more "messed up" than anyone else. Everyone has "issues" so don't worry about it. Just try to relax and enjoy yourself. God bless and take care. Hugs, Lee

Yes, from now on I'm not going to take that sort of abuse, thanks.

[Lizzie B]

Originally Posted by Perna

Make friends with yourself first and quit putting yourself down before engaging others and trying to have a relationship. If your relationship with yourself is not 100%, it's almost impossible to have a good relationship with another person, even if they are fine with themselves (which is all "normal" is).

Yes, I'm definately doing a lot more therapy before getting into another relationship. Thanks.