[marialena]

I am a wife of a man who self injures himself. He cuts his elbow badly and it last for last couple of years. First he was hiding himself, always wearing long sleeves, even in California summers. Then I saw it and he explaines it is because he has a wart, some skin disease and it bothers him. Doctors do not know what is wrong... My husband is very intelligent, educated, smart...he tricked me for long time. Or maybe not tricked me, he believes it is not self injury, he believes he has some mysterious disesase which is so hard to cure. So he studies all possible diseases and order pills from internet, plus tons of different antibiotics - to cure it. Plus he continues to cut his elbow and wound became really huge. He does it in his computer room. First he started during the nights. Now he does it any time and he made clear nobody is welcomed in room. There is blood on the carpet, on his clothes,...basically everywhere... Wound became really big. I am scared he will die - or from inflammation or blooding. And of course it has huge influence on our marriage and on me. I am depressed and from time to time I hate him or hate myself for not being able to change situation.
He started to do it when we lost a lot of money in stocks, basically all our money. I guess he could not cope differently and he does not talk about " not nice things". I do not care about anything anymore. I just want to change this terrible thing. I love him and despite money loss we can have a good end of life together. He is over 60 and me over 50 years old. Still some time to enjoy.
Does anybody have any similar experience, some suggestion, some insight?

I am entirely lost.

[Callmebj]

Hi Marialena, Welcome to PC. I'm sorry that you and your husband have had such
huge difficulties. I can relate to the big loss, but neither of reacted in such a dramatic way. I have lost 10s of thousands of dollars in the market, and never play that gambling game again. It's taken any trust from big business I ever had.

His cutting himself is a very desperate action and do hope you can find a way
to get him to a Therapist with this. If he has ever been in the service, the VA would be a good place to start. That is where I get my therapy.

Had he done this before he lost the money in the market? I feel for you and know
he definitely needs help. Money problems should not be a reason for doing this.
If you will go to the self-injury thread, you might find more answers to his actions.
My sympathies to you for this distress. Hugs, bj