[Lexicon78]

I really feel I'm at my limit about things that irritate the hell out of me today. For one thing, how you can put something so simply to someone and they still don't get it is beyond me! My dad tried to explain something, in the simplest of terms, on how to do something and it was like both me and my dad were speaking a completely different language than my bf.

What the hell is wrong with him? He doesn't seem to understand anything! Even in the simplest of terms it's like he doesn't understand! For instance, my dad told my bf to get a bag to put some macaroni in (the macaroni box got ruined since it had to be put in the back of the truck while it rained on the way home from the store) and my bf didn't understand what me or my dad meant. I knew my dad meant a little baggie and my bf thought he meant something completely different so he got all mad and marched off. So in the end, I had to clean up everything, bagging up all the stuff that had ruined boxes, etc. And my bf then said, oh well, we still have 2 more boxes at home. It's like in his mind it was ruined, which it was far from being ruined!

Then earlier, we were at the store, and he ran off on his own getting all the stuff he wanted for himself...he never let me know what he was buying. To put things simply...we get enough foodstamps for both of us to get food to feed ourselves for about a month. Well, what does he do? Goes off to the last aisle in the store, picking up things that would only feed him and not me. I, on the other hand, am picking items that would benefit both of us.

He said he's also used to buying things in bulk. Well, I told him "we're not rich and you're buying stuff like you are!" I know, it may have been a bit of the harsh truth, but all the same it was the truth. He doesn't realize that we can't shop like that at all.

I guess it's because his daddy and mommy have always bailed him out, paid his way, etc. whenever he's run into problems. I'm sorry but in the freakin real world it's not like that! He refuses to even accept that we are living near poverty...he wants to believe we're in some fairy tale world where everything is handed to ya! Hell no! I just want to shake him and hit him and tell him to wake up.

Also in the store, after I rounded him up a million times, he'd still run off to another aisle while he left his cart...then he'd come back to me and ask where it was! C'mon, I had my own freakin cart! If he'd stay with me and not leave his cart in the middle of some aisle maybe he wouldn't have to run all over the store trying to look for it!

What is wrong with him? He acts like a freakin 3 year old! And people wonder why I don't like shopping with him! I'm just really overwhelmed with so much irritation right now.

Oh and after telling him several times since we met, he once again put his hand on the back of my neck! I am so uncomfortable with it because my ex strangled me that I kinda flip out everytime. Well, today I hit his arm, almost hitting him in the face. Well, if he'd listen to anything I say then that wouldn't happen, ya know?

Right now every tiny little thing he says is making me very irate. And to let you know how stupid and stubborn he is, he thinks colds come from being in the cold, which has already been scientifically proven to be FALSE! No matter what proven evidence I bring up of this fact that it is not caused by the cold he just brings up another instance where he got sick after being outside and then raises his voice each time I argue this point. He refuses to even believe that it is the germs or viruses or whatever in the air that causes colds. C'mon...get over it and EDUCATE YOURSELF!

At this point I'm ready to snap.

[nothemama8]

Take a deep breathe exhale slowly, next time go shopping by yourself, by for you only, let him do the same, then see what he does or says, also keep your foods seperate, this worked for me many years ago
Angie

lexie, i'm sorry....xoxo

[LILITH]

Hi Lexie, so sorry about your troubles.... wish that there was something I could do for you.

[Lexicon78]

Oh gosh, if we separated our foods I'd be eating great and he'd be eating tv dinners because he doesn't know how to cook!

[Sabrina]

I don't really know what to say. My husband and I share grocery shopping and cooking so comfortably. Very often, I don't even have to tell my husband what to buy - and he comes home with what I need. And unless it is something female, usually the right brand too. I am very lucky.

I'm really sorry that you are battling with this.

[Mystry]

Hey Lexicon I know deep down that you love this person and yes he sounds like a real pain in the buttuski...but remember he is male...lol...that in itself should tell you how much of a baby he really is...I don't think us males ever out grow wanting to be babied even though personally I am not that childish (tongue in cheek)...sometimes a good dose of reality is the only thing that will open our eyes...so let him shop for himself...let him change his own diapers...cause really you are the most important person in your relationship and then him and all his faults...and remember he does have some good qualities or you wouldn't be with him...

[hillbunnyb]

In the good old days, a lot of parents pushed their sons into the military to get these kinks orked out. But, that is sooo not a good idea these days......... I agree, seperate stamps, seperate shopping, seperate meals, take care of yourself. . .
so far you're dynamic is called "enabling". Enabling him to stay immature. It isn't helpful in the long run. Change is tricky, try to find a way to have a sense of humor about it....
Good luck.

Hi Lex,
It sounds like he's getting on your last nerve. You'll work things out.

[Maven]

Lex,

Sorry I didn't see this sooner, but honestly, this doesn't sound like a good relationship. He's way too immature. He needs to be on his own and get a dose of reality. That is, if his parents don't bail him out again. I'd say, let him go shopping and do the math himself, but it affects you, too, so that probably isn't a good idea. He'd likely spend the money only on things he wants, and then complain that you didn't give him enough money (for more stuff he wants, not stuff that would benefit you both).

I'm sorry, but to be frank, I think you should dump the little boy, and get a man.

My mom still thinks you get colds from the cold, too, no matter what I tell her. And when I give her information, she doesn't believe me until someone else tells her, and she'll act like that person is telling her something she's hearing for the very first time.