[katya093]

Hello so
long story short
i love my boyfriend but i have a hard time trusting him . His past which was right before we started dating consisted of sex parties and lots of open relationships . I am monogamous .
I know i shouldn't look at the past but it was so close to when we started dating . Through the relationship i found things , he was flirting with girls on his facebook and
would say comments about other women right in front of me .
Like he would say " damn she is a babe , or "she is jail bate "
while i was with him .
I confronted him about it and i said it hurts me and it makes me feel uncomfortable .
he said " i only say it because my friends were saying it too"
but like wth i am his girlfriend .
/:
i am just confused

[jaded67]

you have a right to feel uncomfortable and I think you did the right thing by being upfront....he needs to be more mature about his relationship with you and not be a "follower" to what his friends are doing.

[jaded67]

you should feel uncomfortable and I feel you did the right thing by calling him out on it. if this relationships is important to him, he will be mature about and stop being a "sheep" and follow his friends actions.

good luck

[Jan1212]

Because his friends do it doesn't make it okay... if something makes you uncomfortable he should try to listen to you, is he trying or willing to work it out? It is somewhat tough to change a lifestyle, he will need big time limits and if he is willing, there's good communication, things are mutual, and he truly wants to commit to a relationship, then it's good. How old is he?

[katya093]

ah /: way older then me

and like i never had a problem with my previous bfs checking out other girls as it is human nature but since all this happened
is happening every time he stares at a girl it makes me think back to the comments he says and it really irritates me /:
i have told him why i have a hard time trusting him and all he says is
" have i ever cheated on you ?"
and i say no because he hasnt really .
just does not feel right

[Jan1212]

Trust takes time, but flirting on fb isn't reassuring. past relationships make it harder for you to trust people too. It's okay to ask and talk about it, it' s normal to feel this way and feel a lil insecure, especially if it's early in the relationship, but too much worrying can only hurt. I rly wish you to enjoy your relationship and hoping these thoughts are temporary. He hasn't cheated.

[katya093]

thank you guys ! '

[secretpsych]

He really needs to respect you being uncomfortable with some of his actions. It is a way to show love and devotion to that person, respecting their requests. I do not think you are out of line being upset about him flirting with other girls because you value the monogamous relationship and want to get to know him on a deeper level, past the infatuation.