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Veteran Member
Member Since Sep 2009
Location: Southern Michigan
Posts: 516
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Feb 25, 2013 at 07:50 PM
#1
It turns out my husband was hiding things about himself that were positivr though i eventually figured them out.
The first one is that he has unusually high sexual functioning why hide that? The second one is that he tries to hide his high iq. I have a high iq why hide that Is this a man thing or is he shy or something else Sent from my SCH-R820 using Tapatalk 2 __________________ It's as simple as I love birds...
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Elder
Member Since Oct 2010
Location: Michigan
Posts: 6,543
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Feb 25, 2013 at 07:59 PM
#2
How did you find out he was highly sexual? Perhaps he was hiding it because he may have thought YOU would think he was a freak -- or a pervert.
 Who knows? Evidently you two do not communicate very well.The same with his high IQ -- why on earth would he hide that? For fear that you two would fight about who's the smartest? Or would be in competition? Again, who knows? Communication is very important in a marriage, and you two just don't know how. Perhaps some couples counseling would help -- cause you two should be able to talk about ANYTHING and it's obvious you can't. You should be able to bare your souls to each other and have an open and honest relationship. It's sad that you don't.  Your marriage would be SO much more fulfilling if you did. Why not try some counseling and learn HOW to talk to each other without feeling threatened. It is more than worth it -- it has saved MANY marriages! You don't want to keep living like this for the next 20 years do you? I doubt it. God bless and please take care! Hugs, Lee 
__________________ The truth shall set you free but first it will make you miserable..........................................Garfield |
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Member Since Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
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Feb 25, 2013 at 09:36 PM
#3
Quote:
How do you define high sexual functioning? If it is with you, how was he able to hide from you his functioning with you? I guess, masturbation - he masturbates a lot? Or fantasizes a lot perhaps? I am not sure fantasizing is functioning though. Not sure what you mean. Has he actually been given a Wechsler test or do you say "IQ" just to mean that he is generally a smart person? |
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Veteran Member
Member Since Sep 2009
Location: Southern Michigan
Posts: 516
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Feb 26, 2013 at 07:54 AM
#4
I dont want to go into a lot of detail but he can physically have more sex than normal.
And he hasnt been given an official test but i was told by my cbt therapist hes bright and there are other signs of it too but he plays dumb Sent from my SCH-R820 using Tapatalk 2 __________________ It's as simple as I love birds...
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Account Suspended
Member Since Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
Posts: 14,805
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12 3,729 hugs
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Feb 26, 2013 at 12:15 PM
#5
Very weird. A man who receives such compliments on his cogniive abilities. From his cbt. T is expected to realize that there is no such thing as normal wrt sex.
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Account Suspended
Member Since Sep 2011
Location: Northern California
Posts: 14,805
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12 3,729 hugs
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Feb 26, 2013 at 12:16 PM
#6
But whatever it is, maybe the cbt person will figure it out with time.
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Poohbah
Member Since Jan 2013
Location: Indianapolis, IN
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Feb 26, 2013 at 12:20 PM
#7
I have low self esteem and I tend to play dumb sometimes or I drop hints to correct someone instead of saying they are wrong. I am smart but I don't like the pressure of people looking to me for answers.
Maybe he can have sex all the time but doesn't want to all the time. You can have a candy bar as a nice treat, but if you had 5 candy bars a day it wouldn't feel as good each time. __________________ "Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy." |
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