[Thomi]

Hi. I was diagnosed Bipolar II in 2007 after I started having my "break down" where I sunk into a terrible depression and then periods of severe anxiety. I went from someone people described as "out going and gregarious" to someone who has social anxiety and who gets super chatty in social situations because of it. My family still seems to be having a hard time with it and with me. Before I got "sick", everything was fine and they seemed to respect, like and love me but afterward, my mother said I could chose to be different, my father calls me a drama queen, my sister speaks to me with disdain and my brother just leaves the room shaking his head to show his displeasure. I can't help that I get super chatty and anxious. I try so hard to control it but they act this way toward me even when I'm quiet and relaxed. I feel like they don't even like me or love me anymore and I don't know what to do. My father's birthday dinner was last weekend and I drove an hour to see everyone (driving makes me anxious and get togethers make me anxious so I was super anxious that day). My family was seated around the table talking and my sister admonished me in front of everyone, telling me to "calm down" and stop interrupting my father. My family is one of those loud families that speaks all at once and we're very animated. Everyone was interrupting one another but she picked me out of everyone and embarrassed me. I thought I would cry but I didn't want to ruin my Dad's night so I laughed it off and playfully said "whatever". I don't know what to do anymore. Seeing my family makes me miserable. I can't speak to them in a rational manner because they gang up on me and tell me I'm just being a drama queen. I didn't know saying "When you say this or do this, it makes me sad or makes me feel bad so please don't do that anymore" was being dramatic. They treat me like I'm foaming at the mouth and I'm the same person as I've always been. Even on Facebook, they ignore me. No one returns my calls either. It makes me so sad and miserable. I just wanted to write it down somewhere that people may understand what I'm saying. Thanks for listening.

[Leed]

Dearheart ~ if seeing your family makes you miserable, then DON'T DO IT. Why do something that actually makes you sick?? Some families are actually toxic. And sometimes we have to limit our time with them to perhaps once or twice a YEAR. There is NO REASON to put ourselves thru that kind of torture!!

Each member of your family seems to doubt you are sick at ALL. They're calling you names, like "drama queen," and your mother says that you CHOSE to be this way!! Why on earth would anyone CHOSE to be like this??? It's torture! That isn't a logical statement! And then there's your sister who seems to like embarrassing you. These are TOXIC people.

Limit time with them. Don't worry about not seeing them, or them not returning calls, etc. because they only make you sicker! Stay AWAY from them, my friend. You WILL feel much better once you accept the fact that they only make you SICK.

God bless you Thomi, and I wish you the very best. Please keep posting here, okay? Hugs, Lee

[Thomi]

Thank you so much for the advice, Leed. Sometimes I think, maybe I'm not seeing it correctly? Maybe it's my illness coloring the way I see the situation and I really am a drama queen. I'm glad that I'm not mistaken in my interpretation of this behavior. You've put my mind at ease.

[hamster-bamster]

Since the family is loud and animated, it does seem that in reality every family member is a little bit of a drama queen/king, and your sister really singled you out, and that offended you a lot. I agree that you need to limit time with them.

[Thomi]

Thank you, Hamster-bamster. I think I will from now on as the situation hasn't improved at all.

[gayleggg]

Have you spoken to your pdoc if you have one regarding you extreme anxiety? There are meds that can really help with anxiety. I agree staying away from your family is a good idea. You don't need the negativety that they produce. Some families are just that way.
Gayle

[Thomi]

Thanks Gayle. I have seen a pdoc and unfortunately, his answer was to bombard me with sedatives and in the end, I was on the max dose and I had built up a tolerance so they didn't work anymore. I lost my health insurance after that and currently can't afford to go to a pdoc and don't qualify for financial help. I just have to hang in there until my hubby and I can afford to put me on his insurance. Until then, I just have to limit my exposure to situations (and people) that increase my anxiety.