[boopei]

I thought I'd ask here in case anyone has any ideas.

Most people probably seen a tidbit of some of the crud going on in my crazy life in other threads.

Authorities were investigating my step-kids mother for abuse. Turns out, my partners daughter lied to the authorities. I know at least part of the reason why is that their mother threatened both her and her brother to not open their mouth at all about stuff that goes on at her house. So that's part of it.

So I know both kids are terrified of their mother. They don't want to go with her on weekends, but when they have the opportunity to be honest and deal with it, they don't. I felt awful. His six year old girl is telling lies about him to his mother (her grandmother) and to his ex all the time, but his nine year old is scared, but realizes that it's better to tell the truth, even though it's scary and might hurt in some ways.

I've been trying to get her out of her lying. Saying it's ok to be scared, to always tell the truth and Dad will be there to protect her, but that if she tells lies all the time it hurts people. Nobody will be able to tell when she's telling the truth or lying, and sometime when it really matters, nobody will believe her. (The whole boy who cried wolf thing).

Is there any other things that I could try that aren't too.. much? They see their therapist on Tuesday, so their father is going to talk to the T and see if there's anything that he can do, or if it's just something where his ex has them under her thumb, and so scared that there's nothing either of us can do to help it.

[Travelinglady]

Oh, dear, that is sad. But as a child who was terrified of my mother, I can understand. Please let us know what the therapist says and how it works out.

I don't know how someone can get the truth out of a child in a situation such as this one. It sounds to me like you have been trying the right approach.

Anybody else have any ideas?

[ocdwifeofsociopath]

this may be underhanded, but maybe because she is young she could hear conversations of stories about people who got out of abusive situations even with threats and how it turned out good and nothing bad happened to them when they told...like you just heard it on the news or something....might spark that doubt about the importance of keeping it secret.