[Diane1980]

So I have been married for 13 years and recently my husband told me he joined a spouse support group for husbands with bipolar wives. This is great for him, I know he has been suffering lately. He can not handle my moods, and we have had a rocky time lately. He told me the statistics for bipolar marriages lasting is 10% and he is determined to be that 10%. I don't know if I should be offended by this or not. I would like him to stay for me, not out of loyalty to me or to prove a statistic wrong. Then again perhaps I am over-analysing again.

[Confusedinomicon]

The statistic for a 'bipolar' marriage is shrinking then. The last stat I read said it was a 20% success.

All it amounts to is the difficulty of being a caregiver. If you take the responsibility of creating a network of professionals who treat you it helps your husband and yourself. Having a therapist that you can rely on and is close to your doc may help too. Once you learn coping mechanisms and build a tool box you will be able to feel better and more confident in self care. Try not to feel like a burden and take responsibility for what you can. You aren't hopeless.

Plus the bipolar forum has plenty of members who have had successful long term marriages. The forum itself may be an outlier but its possible to persist.

[Poppy Princess]

I could be wrong but it sounds to me like he's trying his best because he loves you

[lido78]

I agree with Poppy Princess and do not think he'd stay with you just to prove a statistic wrong...that would be kind of messed up....If anything, it sounds like "The odds don't look good but I love you and want to do whatever it takes to beat this and get as much help as I can to do so." I would be very proud if my S.O. reached out for help for both of us in order to preserve the marriage. Not everyone takes this kind of initiative and gets the help they need.

[Thorn Bird]

Some of it depends on how well your bipolar is managed. Some of it depends on if he knew you were bipolar when you met. I agree it can be difficult being with someone with an illness but if he loves you and understands the condition then I am sure he will stay. Maybe the group will help him to understand and learn more. I hope it all works out for you.