My Journey / Joining University/

Dad accompanied me to the university talking not nicely but not bad at least. But the talk didn't last long, the scary silence I am used to took over. I didn't mind. He left after 2 days, I guess. I am not good at making friends, but not that bad as well. I made a few struggling with my low self esteem, which appeared to have grown more than ever. The worst part of the chat in dormitory was that everybody talks about family proudly. All but me talk much about how sweet childhood had been. I had nothing to say; frankly this is not true, I had much to say, but who would listen to a life that of abuse, neglect, and spoiled childhood. This thought crashed me, but I was going on any how.
I became high on smoking, it was not my first puff though, I started it at high school, just out of curiosity. Now that I have more freedom, and some money to get the cigarettes, smoking soon became part of my daily life. I tend to smoke more when I get low, back then I didn't even know the word depression.
I was planning to join medical school to become a doctor, in fact that was the dream of every child in my community. In here one can join medical school direct from high school without having to get a bachelor degree. It just requires good grades during freshman year, which I managed to secure despite everything.
Freshman was not remarkable for anything until it ended and time for vacation came. I did well and got the grades which could get me in to any field of study available at the time. As I was preparing for my vacation to see my mom, I received a message from dad which puts deep hatred for him in my heart that stays to this day...will continue next time. GORE

I am sorry you don't/didn't have a great family relationship. I would be surprised if everyone else had such wonderful ones. Maybe some of the folks might be exaggerating/even lying?

We have a forum here for folks who are survivors of abuse. You might want to read some of the stories there. Here is the link: http://forums.psychcentral.com/survivors-abuse/

Can you think of anything good about your childhood you can share? If not, then maybe you can try to ask the other folks questions about what they saw as so wonderful and maybe try to use them when you have your own family.

Feel free to continue your story on this thread. What happened with your dad and you?

Hello TravelingLady, thank you for the message. Sure I will continue my story but currently am a bit lost, you know I have this problem of being destructed from what I do. I often have to interrupt what I am doing when a new idea comes to my mind, I hope I will get back to the thread soon, and will talk about my dad, me, and much more. I will also visit the link you recommended, thank you for that. GORE

I am glad university is giving you a bit of a better life than being with your family. Not everyone has a good childhood but sometimes one can be in groups of people where it seems like they all do. I hope you will continue your story too.