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Poohbah
Member Since Mar 2002
Location: Washington, USA
Posts: 1,130
22 |
#1
I guess I am having all sorts of interpersonal problems lately. I got so mad at my husband today. All yesterday he hardly wouldn't talk to me and would hardly look at me. I asked him a couple times during the day if things were alright because he looked bummed. He said fine. I asked again at bedtime and he said it was something he couldn't do anything about anyway.
This morning he tosses me a note saying it was an intimacy issue. We haven't had sex in quite awhile. My T and I are working really hard on the PTSD issue and how I was raped as a young child. This of course is making it very difficult to think about sex let alone have it. Hubby knows this. What I don't understand is if he craves intimacy so much why does he turn away from me when I try to kiss him? Why does he stand there stiff and unyeilding when I try to hug him? Are the not intimate actions on my part? I will go to touch him and he will find a reason to get up and leave the room. I am at my wits end. I am trying to give what I can but he wont take it because of what I can't give him at this time. It hurts. Zen<font color=blue> ************ Did You Know: If you rewire the visual input from the eyes of a baby ferret to the auditory (hearing) cortex of its brain, the auditory cortex will "learn" to see? The signals will be less orderly resulting in the ferret having 20/60 vision instead of 20/20.--from study conducted by neuroscientest Mriganka Sur at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology. |
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Account Suspended
Member Since Jul 2001
Location: USA
Posts: 179
23 |
#2
Maybe you two could see your therapist together about this. Seems he has a problem. I would tell him just what you wrote here. Don't know what else to say but best of luck with it.
<font color=orange>Peace to you. curlyq/CQ</font color=orange> <font color=blue>"We are not human beings on a spiritual journey. We are spiritual beings on a human journey." Stephen Covey </font color=blue> <font color=purple>"Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine." Lord Byron</font color=purple> |
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Member
Member Since Jun 2002
Location: pa, usa
Posts: 50
22 |
#3
Maybe he's afraid to accept your intimate gestures because of the sexual feelings they arouse in him? I'm just guessing, but do you think he might be concerned that getting involved in hugging and kissing with you might wind up to be nothing more than an excerise in frustration for him because it's unlikely you'll be able/willing to get as intimate as he would like to? If that's the case, he might prefer to reject your intimate gestures early on rather than risk having you reject him once he's aroused.
Bringing your husband to a therapy session would probably be very helpful. |
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