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fsf123
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Member Since: Jun 2014
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Trig Jun 10, 2014 at 08:25 PM
  #1
Hey ppl new member.. well how can i start this (lol) Im a 28 year old male from nyc . Im a proud father of a 1yr old, that little guy means the world to me. well im going thru some things right now with my sons mother.. we been together for 2 1/2 yrs. well i met 2yrs ago at the local planet fitness .. we started talking and well it went good . we where dating for 2mnths. and she got pregnant. i told her i wasnt ready to have a kid yet. so she told me that she wasnt going to have an abortion, that she was going to give it up for adaption. i wasnt really with the whole adoption thing.. so i told her she wasnt being fair. she told me she was not going to do the abortion because she had a bad experience with an abortion . she had sex with a guy who was 19 and she was 13 .. so her fathr went with the whole court thing to put the guy away. and made her have anabortion wile she was 5 months pregnant . so i guess she was traumatized by the abortion. so i was like ok forget it ill man up. so then i moved in with her into her apartment. so a week went on she told me she was talking t this guy in her apartment bldn . i was upset i let it go . months went buy my son was born. so now we mved in with her mother. i started working she said that that job was not good cause it wsnt bringng in enough money . she started school and working . i was working 12 to 14 hours a day. my job to the house is a 2hr travel cause she took the car and i took public transportation. i would leave 9am to go to work and get home at 2 3 sometimes 4 am. i would ask her to pick me up from work sometimes,, she would say no cause she was tired. i would be like ok . and jumped on the bus and subway. i would call her to pick me up because sometimes it would be extremely cold and sometimes there would br blizzard storms . and when theres a snow storm public trans schedule is crazy . and she woild say no. so i wpuld walk half way home. then come home tired to come and ckean the house .she would leave the house a mess the car a mess. i would clean it all the time untili got tired of it and told her to pls stop making a mess or pick up after her self. so we would argue and argue . then like 3 weeks ago i loose my job she gets mad. she got upset that like 2 weeks ago she went out i was like ok she is stressed let her go . but she didnt come back the whole weekend. i asked her if she slept with some 1 . mind u guys i asked her weeks b4 if she was seeing some1 else she wuld smile and say no. so then i asked her the day she came back from her weekend ans she said yes i went to see some1 a friend i was like ok. and what u guys did she said a date and i ask her did u sleep with her she said yes . cuz she wasnt happy with me and she needed her needs. it hit me so hard. that i left the car and didnt come back 4 a week went and stood over my mothers house . when she told me what she did i git upset and threw a small Poland spring water bottle at her (empty). i admit i was wrong to hurt her. but then she went and told every 1 in my family i smaked her up and all. so what did my fam do just ignored her. cause they know i wont hurt a female. so she seen no1 paid her any attention. cause they didnt want to get involved. so then she threatened me she wasnt going 2 let me see my son. thats when it hit me hard.. the women i loved cheated on me i was not seeing my son. and i also missed her older son wich i took in as my own. i was about to throw myself onto traffic that day but the thing that stoped me was a picture of my son. now she apologized and wants me to take her back. but i cant trust her any more. she told me i just started talking to the guy. but then her email where open and she was talking to her since april. and she always kept telling me in the past she misse dher ex . what should i do ppl i just dont want to get hurt any more
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hvert
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Default Jun 11, 2014 at 08:23 AM
  #2
I'm sorry you are going through all of this -- it sounds awful. I would be cordial in order to keep up relations with my son, but this woman is dangerous. Making false accusations about you smacking her up is a huge red flag. What else is she capable of lying about? I would start looking for a lawyer now to protect your custody rights.
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fsf123
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Member Since: Jun 2014
Location: nyc
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8 yr Member
Default Jun 11, 2014 at 10:47 AM
  #3
well hvert as of now she apologized . she saying she want 2 work it out. but i dont know if i should trust her . i seen her these past few days and all i can think ans see is her doing what she did.. now to finde out the guy i thought that she slept with said he didnt slept with her just flirted thru the phon (sexting and what not) she would talk about another friend she was talking 2 . is like i dunno if i should try and take her back..
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Default Jun 13, 2014 at 11:09 AM
  #4
I wouldn't take her back based on what you wrote, but I'm not in the middle of the situation and only have the one side. Why does she keep lying? Do you think she can stop?

The thing about her telling people you smacked her around is really, really bad, worse than cheating, imo. A neighbor of mine had a false report filed on him several years ago and it has complicated his life. He could lose his job if she does it again, as well as access to his kid.

Another friend is going through a situation right now where he called the state because his GF was physically abusing their child and she called the cops on him to retaliate. It's turning into an extremely ugly breakup, which is probably why I am seeing red flags with your GF. I might just be hyper sensitive about this right now.

I hope that it all works out, whatever you decide to do. Perhaps it would be worthwhile to talk to someone about custody rights even if you do take her back.
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