[miamayaisabelle]

Many adolescents have romantic feelings at one point. I developed romantic feelings for my neighbor, a friend, when I was seven (she's two years older). Eight years later, I've found that I still have these feelings. A recent event has caused my feelings to rise again. I found out that she has a long distant girlfriend who she met on the internet. Besides that, I'm having issues with acting myself around her. I want our friendship to be strong, because I admire her and enjoy talking to her a lot. I know it'll be more lasting than any romantic phase. How do I mentally train myself to help improve my communication skills to continue having a healthy relationship with my friend? Also, please give other advice on this situation. There is a constant silent debate on if I should express my feelings to her.

[hvert]

Has she ever indicated that she might share your feelings? Does she know you like girls?

[soccerdad]

Well my expert math skills tell me that you are 15 and she is 17 so in terms of communication skills you probably are where you are supposed to be. As you get older you'll mature and develop stronger communication skills but be warned - no matter how old you get there will always be people who make you weak in the knees and stumble over your words. I'm 35 and there is still one person that makes me act like I'm in elementary school again

As for the romantic feelings well its a hard decision. If you hang back and don't say anything then you may lose your chance but if you go for it and she doesn't reciprocate you may be embarrassed. In my opinion (and experience) it is better to risk suffering a little embarrassment then risk losing out on a good thing. I'm always a fan of taking the chance. If you never try then you never get anywhere. If she doesn't have feelings for you then accept it and move on but at least then you know.

[miamayaisabelle]

Originally Posted by hvert

Has she ever indicated that she might share your feelings? Does she know you like girls?

No, she has never plainly indicated that. It's nothing that I would have recognized. Yes, she knows I like girls.

[miamayaisabelle]

Originally Posted by soccerdad

Well my expert math skills tell me that you are 15 and she is 17 so in terms of communication skills you probably are where you are supposed to be. As you get older you'll mature and develop stronger communication skills but be warned - no matter how old you get there will always be people who make you weak in the knees and stumble over your words. I'm 35 and there is still one person that makes me act like I'm in elementary school again

As for the romantic feelings well its a hard decision. If you hang back and don't say anything then you may lose your chance but if you go for it and she doesn't reciprocate you may be embarrassed. In my opinion (and experience) it is better to risk suffering a little embarrassment then risk losing out on a good thing. I'm always a fan of taking the chance. If you never try then you never get anywhere. If she doesn't have feelings for you then accept it and move on but at least then you know.

Thanks for clearing that up. It's difficult to tell, as an adolescent, how adult like I should be. For example, the communication situation.

I don't know if it'd just be a little embarrassment. I always hear adults talking about how when they were younger what was embarrassing at the time wasn't really a big deal at all. However, because she's my neighbor, it'll follow me for a long time. My parents may find out which would cause a big change in the family. She may not want to talk to me again and it'd be awkward because of how close we live. I'm hoping that if she ever shares the same feelings, she'd express them.

Thanks a lot!