[ace333]

So this situation came up and cause a huge fight between me and bf last night. Mostly just him yelling at me for no reason. We have been together 6 years, we have never lived together. We live seperate but still really close so we are at each others houses frequently. But I hate going to his house I have extremely sensitive allergies and everything im most allergic to is him and his apartment. He smokes hes very lazy and doesnt clean effiecntly so theres tons of dust and mold everywhere and the biggest thing of all im allergic to is cats he has two. When im there I cant stay for more than an hour or I start having asthma and breathibg problems.
Last night he asked me if he could bring the cats to my place because he shares his apt with his father whose an acholic and hes afraid to leave the cats alone with him. I understand this problem amd do feel bad for the cats but I dont particulaly like cats and then of course im highly allergic to them. I feel crappy in general and know if they are here im going to feel worse. I already clean obsessivly whats gonna happen to me if I say yes.
I told him id rhink about it because I am highly allergic I dont want them especially in my bed or my on my couch and I know thats exactly where their going to want to sit. They both shed horrendously and id have to bathe them from coming from his smoke filled house. One cats has the tendancy to puke up food alot which I dont want to deal with on my carpet.
I simply told him id think about it because its like hes trying to dump them on me. He flips out yelling at me saying if he moved in with what did I think he was going to get rid of them. No I knew he wouldnt , but honestly we have been together 6 years and hes always made excuses for not moving in with me to now if he says it I just ignore him and dont believe hes ever going to move in. And the way hes been acting towards makes me question if I even want to live and or be with him. He behaved like I had to make the decision right then and when I didnt give him the yes he wanted he freaked out. All because I asked him to shower because he smells like cigarettes ( im allergic) and said id think about taking cats (im allergic)
So in the end the question is should I take in the cats? Even though I feel like hes just dumping them on me and one day hell just breakup with me and ill be stuck with cats I dont really want in the first place?

[hvert]

No, don't get pressured into taking the cats in. You are allergic, you don't like cats, and they are not your pets.

[lovesdogs99]

That doesn't sound like that healthy of a relationship.. Unless he can be mature about it.. freaking out on you isn't much of a mature response.

[~Christina]

No way ! You are allergic .. It will make you s i c k ! If your BF cant understand that them he is a very selfish person .. Do you really want to stay with someone that would push something like this on you ? knowing health issues ?

Dont let him bully you !

Good luck

[MissBelle00]

I am also terribly allergic to cats, dust, and smoke.

I would NEVER put up with someone who thought they were in the right to bully me and make me sick!!!

What are you doing being with this man for six years of your life???
What you wrote is already enough for me to know this entire time has been wasted.

If I were you, I'd get out of this horrendous relationship and find someone who will RESPECT you.

He has NO RIGHT to flip out on you because you say no. You don't owe him anything!!

[MissBelle00]

If this man cared an ounce for you, he would know well enough that if he wanted to move in with you, he'd have to get rid of his cats. You should NOT, in any way shape or form, let him think for ONE SECOND that he'd be able to move in to YOUR place and take his cats with him.
No way jose.

[BadWolf]

Offer to help find a different safe place for the cats? But really I agree with everyone else. It doesn't sound like he cares about you more than some cats.

[healingme4me]

But, you both knew these things about each other when getting together. Is it about respect, or was it each of you believed the other would change?

I don't see a happy medium here.

[lilypup]

I love cats and have three of my own. I would never give my cats to someone who was allergic or someone who didn't want one. Cats are a lot of work and they need their fair share of love. From the cats' point of view, he probably needs to find them new "forever" homes. Cats don't belong with such a jerk and neither do you.

[ChipperMonkey]

I guess I'm confused why you'd be with someone for 6 years who has habits that make you sick which he won't give up? (That is, the smoking.) It makes me sick, and I won't even date someone who smokes. Put yourself first and don't accept that behavior.