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Member
Member Since Aug 2014
Location: London
Posts: 32
10 16 hugs
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#1
So it was only a few days ago a real cute guy accepted my request on fb.Just so you know I like him based on looks,the person I love is just ,you know too good to describe with words,her flaws are what make her perfect,YES SHE,don't be so imature gawsh XD.Anyways lets call this guy Alex(fake name) well he started saying how he really wants a girlfriend,and then suddenly asks me out.Before I was even able to answer he sent me a photo of his arm.The photo was horrible...there were multiple cuts on his arm,so deep it was unbelievable,I'm surprised he's still alive.
I immediately felt so sad,and worthless.I had to help him,he needed help.:/ so I said I would date him. Up until now,I wish I never sent that request. i now know his real personality.He may have the looks but he doesn't have the personality.He is a greedy pervet that needs to keep his sexual desires to himself.He is a BASTARD. language,sorry. He's pretty much talked to me the whole day,and he's been asking when we can meet so that we could have sex. Tbh I have absolute no interest in him now. He said he wants to meet me tomorrow but I avoided it by saying"I'm tired,Goodnight baby" I'm already tired of this act I have to put up.He has already became so attached to me if I break up with him he'll probably cut even more. He is Chinese btw his English is not so good,so it's a little difficult for us to communicate,but today He was trying to say he cut his wrist with a knife and fainted. Whenever I ask him why he self-harms he suddenly gets defensive,and asks me why I'm asking,almost trying to argue his way out of the conversation. I'm stuck in such a situation.I don't know what to do . :/ plus the more I talk to Alex,the less I talk to the girl I love.I miss her so much more now that I don't talk to her much help....? |
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Carpe Diem
Member Since Aug 2012
Location: New England, USA
Posts: 4,312
12 631 hugs
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#2
You are not responsible for the actions of others. It sounds like he's using his self harm as a way to keep you on the hook. Your response...
I'm sorry I'm not interested anymore. I wish you luck... You are not responsible for what he does. Don't let him control you. |
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IchbinkeinTeufel, Open Eyes
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,251
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13 21.5k hugs
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#3
I agree with TheWell, you are not "stuck" unless you allow yourself to be "stuck", always remember that. You need to take care of "you" first and he is not healthy for you and you can't help/fix him either. You need to be strong and tell him you want to end your relationship with him and that is it, don't contact you anymore. You need to be firm otherwise he will keep asking you to stay involved.
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Legendary Wise Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jul 2011
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 22,450
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13 12.7k hugs
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#4
__________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Apr 2013
Location: Ontario Land
Posts: 3,591
11 |
#5
He is trouble. What he is doing is wrong. Listen to the advice of the other posters.
I'm perplexed. Why would a stranger show you his SI scars? __________________ Dx: Didgee Disorder |
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IchbinkeinTeufel
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Elder
Community Liaison
Member Since Jan 2010
Location: Earth
Posts: 6,270
14 258 hugs
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#6
In my opinion, sending pictures of self harm to people, at least without any warning or consent, is both disconcerting and highly inappropriate. (I have a history of self-harm and have been clean for about 5 years, so forgive me if my opinion seems skewed)
Have nothing to do with him, would be my advice, and I'm fervently sticking to it. I strongly believe he added you for attention and some sort of, "Look at me and my scars! Pity me!" If you have SH stuff on your FB (or other rather serious mental health stuff) that is public, which I'm guessing it is, I strongly recommend making it private, so as to avoid that sort of person. I'm not denying those are the actions of someone struggling; he very clearly needs help. Lastly, I recommend adding only those of whom you know, so as to avoid unwanted people seeing all there is to see about you on your Facebook. __________________ { Kein Teufel }
Translation: Not a devil [ `id -u` -eq 0 ] || exit 1 |
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Grand Poohbah
Member Since Jul 2014
Location: out west
Posts: 1,606
10 236 hugs
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#7
Sorry this happened to you. Work hard to find healthier people. Once you get a red flag move right along.
__________________ Lamictal Rexulti Wellbutrin Xanax XR .5 Xanax .25 as needed |
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