[purplemystery]

I have graduated college and I'm currently living with my parents. I wish I didn't have to, but it's my only option right now. I've always felt on-edge at home because my dad is somewhat emotionally abusive/narcissistic. He admittedly treats me better than he used to, probably because I'm an adult. But I still have resentment toward him. Anyway, I've noticed that my energy level at home compared to living at college is much different. I'm so much less motivated, I end up sitting around doing nothing when I had things I needed to do, and I endlessly watch TV. I do have a full-time job and am pretty motivated for that. But there's something about home that sucks the soul out of me. I don't know if it's also because I'm really lonely in general or that I'm still adjusting to full-time work, but I just wanted to see if anyone else has experienced a noticeable lack of energy in relation to a certain place. How can I stop myself from feeling so drained when there's no way I can move out just yet?

[hvert]

When I'm stuck in situations like that, I find planning my escape makes me feel better. If I were in your shoes, I'd be thinking of actions I could take that would speed up my departure, even if I knew it wouldn't happen until a certain date.

Can you spend more time out of the house? Maybe take a class or something?

[divine1966]

If I had to live with my parents I would end up in inpatient treatment. I would be more than drained I would lose my mind. Sorry I am no help. Since you have free time get a second job and save to be able to move out ASAP.

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[JJBX]

You probably feel that way because you're taking it to mean that you've failed at life. You said yourself that you hate having to live with your parents and that's understandable. I think your mind is actually taking it as a defeat. It sounds like a case of Learned Helplessness, where you feel like you're in a bad/threatening situation that you cannot escape from.

What you can try to do is set small goals for yourself that will let you see that you AREN'T trapped at your parents' house. Little savings goals or even interview goals. "I'm going to rewrite my resume by the end of the day based on some guides", "by the end of the week, I'm going to get feedback from at least 2 people on my resume", "I'm going to apply to at least 5 jobs that I meet qualifications for by the end of the day", etc. You can even set other goals like, working out for 30 minutes today or reading through a guide on Sharepoint (or some other useful office tool that you can add to your resume). Small goals that you can accomplish within the span of a day or two. When you start accomplishing some goals, you will gradually start feeling more confident. The confidence will boost your motivation and energy gradually and you'll start feeling more capable.

Start small and don't put too many things on your agenda right away. You can build that up as you start feeling more confident.