[Aviza]

He called me this morning, my best friend suggested I tell him about the blood clot. He said he still loves me and wondered how I was doing as far as the blood clot. Talked about how bad his truck is too. I'm so drawn to him, my mom who liked him at first hates him now, I know I need to talk to my therapist but that's not until tomorrow. I don't know what to do I want to be with him but I'm not supposed to be. My mom thinks once you break up it's final, usually it is, but not this time. She's making things really hard for me, but I know she has some valid points. Agh.

[Open Eyes]

((Aviza)),

It's ok for you to "grieve" what ever you feel is "lost" to you. Often a person will need to grieve whatever that person "felt" was a person they thought might be able to fit into their "dream of". Often, it isn't so much the person that is being grieved, but instead how one began to feel they might be able to finally have something "they dreamed and desired to have", some kind of "true love" experience that finally "comes to them". What can make this more challenging is when this other person says "I love and miss you", because surely this must be "true love finally coming to me".

This "dream of" is actually pretty powerful, and risky in that in trying to obtain this dream of can most definitely create a kind of curtain where the individual fails to recognize the reality in that this "dream of" is drawing that individual into experiencing something far from actual "healthy true love".

As human beings we are very intelligent, however, we are STILL very vulnerable to how "nature" draws us toward our main function which is "reproduction". Actually, if you were to watch documentaries that explore all of the "nature" around us in our world, you would begin to see all the ways all of nature has developed different ways reproduction takes place. Usually, it is the male that has the "most" color and size and ways that stand out in order to attract "females" to mate. Sitting and observing which is something one can do because of all the time put into capturing so many aspects of nature, is indeed very enlightening and amazing because of all the different ritualistic and often very elaborate ways so many animals actually mate.

Recently, BBC has been airing a special where they captured a lot of "new" footage that tends to focus the most on what nature does in our oceans. This series is called Blue Planet II. If you have not seen it, I really recommend making the effort because it's just absolutely amazing to be able to see all they captured that shows so much of what "nature" does that takes place all around us in our world and our oceans.

Yes, we as human beings have an awareness that is more of an awareness than all other species on this planet, however, we are very much driven by nature as is all other living things on this planet.

So, when you talk about how this man you engaged with is being exposed to a younger woman who is in "mating and reproducing" age and he has talked about wanting children and that he may very well choose this other woman over you, this is not "crazy thinking". You are being more realistic and that is part of at least your having some ability to reason even though you are grieving "the dream of love". While it can be so very hard to see the difference between the "dream of" and the reality. It is very important to allow self to grieve and at the same time allow self to see the "reality" and YES that can be difficult. This is because of how as human beings we like to embrace "that dream of" and little girls grow up with this deep inner belief that someday their true prince will come and they will live happily ever after.

[Macd123]

Your mom thinks once you break up that’s it 🤔.... I know people who got divorced and then remarried. I don’t know what your situation is but if you’re sticking around just to be in a relationship don’t - there has to be a way better reason like you really care about this person..... good luck

[~Christina]

Your going to go back and forth , but is he really a good thing for you? He has anger issues, broken truck, works only part time and the whole sexual object he put in you AFTER you said no !?

Please talk to your therapist and really LISTEN

Why do you want to go back to this guy?