[passionfruit3]

My family is splitting up everone is leaving me.my sister is turning eighteen and off to texas shell go my older sister is twenty four and already gone she wants to move my brother down there with her my parents are about to divorce and i wont see one or the other much and when they die i will be even more alone i feel like curling up in a ball and dying

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Passionfruit - I need to ask your age range.

How dependant have you been on your siblings? Did it go beyond having them in the house to relying on them to socialize and do things? Did they have a hand in rearing you? Jus some thoughts I have.

Your parents. Did you see this split coming or was it a surprise? Do you understand why it has come? Is there a recognition that this might be best?

Perhaps this has already happened but I think you, mom, and dad ought to sit down together. Point out to them your worries and concerns about the dynamics and that you are unsure where you fit in. What would they like from you and in turn what would you like from them. Add into the conversation how the moving on of your siblings is affecting you and maybe you guys can iron out what maintaining a relationship with them will look like.

What are and were your expectations regarding your siblings? Looking at their ages they are well beyond that of moving out and gaining their independence (I was 17).

Finally, we come to you and your feelings. You are entitled to every one of them and they are completely valid. You have a right to anger! A right to pain! A right to feel alone and forgotten! Go ahead, get it out.

That chat with your parents could be just the thing.

[Skeezyks]

Hello passionfruit3: I'm sorry this is happening to you. I would simply like to send some warm thoughts your way with the hope that you will be able to weather this most difficult storm.

[IrisBloom]

Assuming you are a young adult, you will soon find where you belong and begin to build your own life. Try not to worry about what might happen in the future. Some people take longer to find themselves than others, but you can do it.

[passionfruit3]

Well im a disabled young adult so my family has looked after me since fourteen and up i understand my parents splitting is for the best and i saw it coming but my parents said they were going to split up ages ago and never did despite the arguments the out of control fighting i felt comfortable with my family having something to hold onto that was mine if they go away what do i have im not dependent even at 23 college never worked out cant work never had a relationship or am out enough to be in one plus im afraid ill screw it up .i tried volunteering at the aspca but that fell through and frankly i don't have transportation to get from place to place disabled bus is twenty dollars every ride.its a lot.and my family leaving on top complicates things i go to this day program its an old worn down building with smelly old people,no offense to any eighty year olds,im the only young person except one other guy im only there cause my parents cant keep an eye on me in the day but thats all i have to look forward to in life that program.
I will talk to my parents ive talked to my mom a little she says i wont be there forever but i don't believe her ive been there two almost three years now i don't want to grow old there

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[IrisBloom]

Aww. I'm sorry you have so many obstacles. Won't one of your parents or siblings continue to take care of you? Do you have your own income? I know it's hard when your parents divorce and your siblings move away at the best of times, much more so with all you have to deal with. Are there any local organizations that help people in your situation?

[Skeezyks]

Hi passionfruit3: Are you not eligible for some sort of state independent living / vocational rehabilitation services? I don't know anything about these sorts of things in California. However, in Minnesota, there are services such as these that are available to persons who have disabilities. The services that are available in Minnesota aren't wonderful... but at least their something...

[Mayflower7]

Hi Passionfruit3,
Sorry your having these problems, talk to your parents about your worries. Lots of people are in your situation and understand how your feeling.
Are there any groups for the young disabled locally ? Have some hobbies to do at home, that keeps me going. Having support online will help. I am sure that your family love you and will all keep in touch. Change is scary, take care.