[shakespeare47]

Does anyone else have success stories related to getting people out of your life? And/or lessening their impact on your life?

I've had some success with the people I mentioned in this thread.
(but I no longer identify as a person w/ BDP).

I've gone through periods of time when I was exceedingly shy... and then I started to force myself to do things, even though I was afraid. I think what happened is that I started to see myself as someone who always had an answer, and who was always ready to engage with anyone. Now that behavior is causing problems. It's like anyone can come up to me at anytime, and I feel like I need to engage... It's like I'm telling everyone, "You are so important that you may interrupt me at anytime and I will pay attention to you." But, really, there are times when I'm doing my own thing, I have goals and other pursuits that are important to me. And I'd like to find a way to express that to certain people (and/or all people, at certain times), instead of engaging with them.

Originally Posted by shakespeare47

Does anyone else have success stories related to getting people out of your life? And/or lessening their impact on your life?

I've had some success with the people I mentioned in this thread.
(but I no longer identify as a person w/ BDP).

I've gone through periods of time when I was exceedingly shy... and then I started to force myself to do things, even though I was afraid. I think what happened is that I started to see myself as someone who always had an answer, and who was always ready to engage with anyone. Now that behavior is causing problems. It's like anyone can come up to me at anytime, and I feel like I need to engage... It's like I'm telling everyone, "You are so important that you may interrupt me at anytime and I will pay attention to you." But, really, there are times when I'm doing my own thing, I have goals and other pursuits that are important to me. And I'd like to find a way to express that to certain people (and/or all people, at certain times), instead of engaging with them.

Lots of people will stay out of your life until they want something from you. I had this with a'friend' who always wanted to see me when she wanted help with projects. When i asked her for something i needed and was very important she was not there. So no more'friendship' and no more free work. I ignore her texts now.

Also have another friend who wants to come when i go driving but when i need him to come with me to an importan appt not so much. i have decided to get all my current 'friends' out of my life as they are just free loaders who want me when i have something they want but not otherwise