[TishaBuv]

Having decided that telephone calls to my mother are to briefly check in or make plans, I successfully ran this morning's obstacle course.

I say "Hi". She says "Hello" in a flat, dead, curt tone.
I say "Happy New Year". She says it back, again in sarcastic tone.
I tell her brief things about my sons. She isn't at all happy for them because she thinks what they're doing is not good enough.
I try to stroke her ego by asking if she got any medical test results back from her doctor. She likes it when everybody is very concerned over her health.
She moans and groans about that and how the expensive pill she takes doesn't work.
I say "I keep telling you to try Activia. It works for me."
No, she won't try it. She says nothing works.
I nicely say so long and hang up. Phew! Good run, me! Pat on back

[divine1966]

Great job.

My t says it's ok to limit interactions with toxic people. Keep to a minimum. My parents are together so if I am short with dad then it upsets my mom ( she isn't toxic and battled cancer for year so no need to upset her ) so my t says when he gets hostile I can just politely say " got to go dad see you later" or if my mom is around then keep talking to mom. My t says don't let him to prevent you from enjoying your life but no need to be mean or rude with him either as it effects my mom.

So I am following her advice and it looks you did just the same. Kept it to a minimum but was still polite. Happy new year!

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[unaluna]

(((Tisha))) if you can still smile after that phone call, you are superwoman in my book!!! I have already resolved not to answer the phone this weekend. My mother died this past summer, and no one else has the right to call me up and make me feel like crap. my cousin texted at 9 in the morning on xmas day - she woke me up! Why? Why? To make sure i am still alive? That depresses me even more! Boundaries people! t

[gayleggg]

Good job. You deserve an award.

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[ComfortablyNumb5]

Sounds like she's stubborn and craves a lot of attention. It's like she wants to be the child here. I would limit the phone calls and cut them short when she starts acting like this. If it means ignoring her calls, then so be it! If you're going to keep talking to her then prepare yourself. That's what I have to do every time I call my dad. I get so nervous my palms get sweaty and I just make the convo short and to the point. If he starts to put me down I change the subject back to the original meaning of the call or I simply say "gatta go!" Good luck!

[LucyD]

She sounds like she needs professional help but probably won't take any advice to get it. That's a tough situation. That is very nice of you to communicate with her despite how se acts towards you.