[Sierana]

Happy New Year!

I'm here cause I'm feeling a bit sad. I've been dating my girlfriend for the past 6 months. Our relationship is perfect and we truly love each other. She is an amazing human being!
She is very close to her friends and they've organized a while ago, we were not dating at that momemt, this Christmas and New year's eve trip so they can be together, there's no problem in this right? Right!
She texts me every day, however I'm feeling a bit sad cause she posted some photos and a text like "Could this year start in a better way?" and yes, I'm jealous and I was crying cause I feel that I'm not her priority but she is mine...
I know... this may be all about some lack of self-estime and I know she loves me but I can't avoid feeling ****.
Any advice?
Sorry if this sounds stupid but it's really important for me.
Thank you!

[ChipperMonkey]

What is your definition of "priority"...?

It isn't healthy to drop everyone else when you find a new partner and make them your everything.

I don't think it's fair of you to say that she isn't making you a priority because she is maintaining friendships and going on trips with her friends. And why add in the bit about the trip being planned before you two got together? Do you expect her to not make plans with her friends now that you're with her? By saying the trip was planned before you came along makes it seem like you don't expect these friend activities to continue.

And just because she makes a comment about the new year starting off so great doesn't mean that everything else I her life is shytty, but your post makes it seem like you're feeling horrible because you expect to always be the best thing in her life.

I suggest therapy. I recommend CBT a lot. You're mind reading, making assumptions, and doing black and white thinking. I think CBT could really help you.

[Rose3]

Maybe you and she will be able to talk about the times that you want to be together. Is she planning to go away every Christmas and New Years? Do you and she want to spend Christmas together?

[LucyD]

I'm sorry you are feeling so sad. I think before you know it she will be back and you will be together. Maybe you just need to get used to her having others in her life. Sometimes that can be hard especially when you have low self esteem. Have you ever tried positive affirmations. You can write out all your good qualities and affirm yourself that way. Please realize you mean a lot to her too. I hope things will start to go better for you.

[x_BabyG_x]

It sounds like theres a serious lack of self esteem on your behalf here. If you have not been together that long then maybe you just need to adjust to the relationship. When you care about someone and feelings develop with the progression of the relationship, you feel happy that that person has the space to enjoy herself, even if that doesnt involve you in some way. You are not soley the only thing that is happening in her life; she will have loads of fragments that will all balance out ; her relationship, her friends, her family, career, etc.

Maybe theres a deeper personal issue with you that has come to light with you alone with your thoughts and her not there to occupy them? (i might be wrong, its just a thought)

Hope you feel better soon. hugs x

[Jupi]

Everything will be okay. That's what I tell my self cause I don't have other things to help me.

[Sierana]

Hello everyone,
Thank you for your help! I really appreciate your words!
Time has passed by and our relationship is being growing stronger every day.
I've realized the big lack of self-esteem I have and I'm working on it.
Thank you!!
Ana