[black-roses]

I just feel useless and I have no idea what career i would do and I admit I feel like I just went into the camgirl because I didn't feel good enough and I lowered my self worth by listening to my thoughts that I was only good enough for this job. I feel hurt and I feel like my insecurities are exactly the things that are making me self destruct I said I wanted money but all I really wanted was to prove that my negative thoughts were correct that I was only good for that. I may have not earned enough but the ****** things I did made me feel worse and now I know I must not listen to my negative thoughts they are just cruel bullies. Like the kids at school that say mean things I must name those thoughts after cruel people I will name my cruel thought bob and that way its not a part of myself saying these mean things but some thought from the outside making me believe these things!!! BOB IS A LIAR I WILL PROVE IT SO!!!

[healingme4me]

Would any job, do? Can you find work at a factory or similar? Sometimes what seems menial has benefit in getting out, earning pay and stepping back from the current stimuli that drags at your emotions.