[lovethesun]

I was talking with an aquaintance from my gym class. She brought up the fact that I did not wave at her and her husband when I passed them on the road one day. I told her I must not have recognized them as they were in their new car. She and her husband did not wave at me either. If they had waved I would have certainly waved back even if I did not recognize them. I told her this. Then she laughed it off but had to get what I call a "veiled insult" in when she said, "Well we were like, "That was rude" and my husband said you probably already think he's rude anyway." So what am I to make of that comment?? That he doesn't care for me and is rude to me on purpose?? What do you all think of that comment? Man I hate pettiness! I mean why even bring this up if you didn't wave at me either.

[BlossomingLen]

Hello! It's a pleasure to meet you.

When I read what you wrote, my immediate thought was; "Maybe a lot of people think he's rude?" As in, maybe he's really standoffish and distant towards a lot of people, and thus, the comment of being rude is made a lot towards him. So maybe when he meets people, he always thinks that they see him as rude, since that mindset is so common? That's just what I made of it.

Have a wonderful day!

[TishaBuv]

I think the comment's about him, not personally about you. He must usually be a pretty rude person, so he assumes you already think he's rude. That's my guess. You didn't say anything wrong.

[hvert]

That comment makes me think of three letters I probably can't type here. I think your last sentence really sums it up -- what was the point of her bringing that up??

[Bill3]

If this comes up again, you can always say that you concentrate on the road and don't notice who else may be driving at the time.

How well do you get along with this person? It just puzzles me too as to why she would bring this up.

[lovethesun]

Originally Posted by Bill3

If this comes up again, you can always say that you concentrate on the road and don't notice who else may be driving at the time.

How well do you get along with this person? It just puzzles me too as to why she would bring this up.

Hi Bill.....I'd say my relationship with this person is very guarded. I always try to be cordial, but as you can see from this small snippet of a conversation between she and I, her comments always have strings attached. Just always seems like she's setting me up or something. Can't trust her. And she has this way of passively arguing with you....like she's trying to rub your face in something that she did not like, but won't come out directly and say it. And she's always quick to bring up something you did, but then forgets she's just as guilty. I've honestly never met anyone like this person. And I wish I had never met her in the first place. She gives off really bad vibes/bad energy.

[Bill3]

She sounds like an opportunity to establish and maintain boundaries!

[Crazy Hitch]

Some people feel the need for the upper hand or the last say. There was no point to her side swiping you. So even though it might be difficult, try not to overanalyse it, as she's the one with the issue here, not you.

[A Red Panda]

She might have been trying to ensure you didn't find her rude for not waving?
No idea.

She might be being catty in bringing it up, but you are now dwelling on it instead of just letting it go. So if she wanted to upset you, you've just have her what she wanted.

[divine1966]

You encounter quite a lot of strange and argumentative people in your life.
Neighbours, parents of kids your kid goes to school with, classmate in college etc

since you can't always choose neighborhoods etc maybe you can become more selective. I am not sure how and why you even have to talk to these less than pleasant people let alone be upset over their actions. I never wave at neighbours when driving. There is no need to explain anything.

I think becoming more choosy who you associate with would help you to avoid these bizarre people

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[mugwort2]

My thoughts Some people are real doozies and it would be good, helpful to keep that in mind Cliche but true Nobody can please everybody. She sounds very nitpicking.

[lovethesun]

Originally Posted by divine1966

You encounter quite a lot of strange and argumentative people in your life.
Neighbours, parents of kids your kid goes to school with, classmate in college etc

since you can't always choose neighborhoods etc maybe you can become more selective. I am not sure how and why you even have to talk to these less than pleasant people let alone be upset over their actions. I never wave at neighbours when driving. There is no need to explain anything.

I think becoming more choosy who you associate with would help you to avoid these bizarre people

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Maybe I'm too nice and it shows. Or maybe I just need to move. Thanks for your input.

[Bill3]

I don't think that you need to move.

[divine1966]

I don't think you need to move per se but you said in the past that you don't like your neighborhood. It just seems to have disproportionally large number of strange people. But moving isn't easy especially if you own the house

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[lovethesun]

Originally Posted by divine1966

I don't think you need to move per se but you said in the past that you don't like your neighborhood. It just seems to have disproportionally large number of strange people. But moving isn't easy especially if you own the house

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Well if I wrote a book about the people in my neighborhood, it would probably become a best seller. Perhaps I can do that and the money raised will offset the costs of moving.

[Sula B]

This woman sounds like a *****. Sorry for being blunt but she sounds like someone who ahs nothing better to do than cause problems were there really are none. As for her husband, have you spoken to him? You're taking her word for what he thinks and has said and in my experience when someone a immature and pathetic as her uses someone else as her excuse its because she's looking for an excuse.

Matey, I miss people all the time as I walk with my face facing the ground and I'm often "on a mission" running from one job/errand to another - I have no freakin idea who I'm walking past and frankly time had taught me not to care. I live in a relatively small rural town and I even have friends who jump out in front of me and yell things like "Hey don't you ignore me" (being funny) and then we have a laugh about it because they know how I am and how much crap I have to get through in a day.

Don't take it personally, this woman just sounds like a person you ant as much distance from as possible.

[divine1966]

You don't have to socialize with neighbours. You don't need to be rude but socializing isn't required. Do you work? I personally am not home enough to even know my neighbours beyond "hello how are you" .

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[lovethesun]

Originally Posted by divine1966

You don't have to socialize with neighbours. You don't need to be rude but socializing isn't required. Do you work? I personally am not home enough to even know my neighbours beyond "hello how are you" .

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I need to get a job. The neighbor 2 doors down that haunts me everyday necessitates that I do. And I don't go looking for her. She's just always in my face. And I know she hates me. I think I'll tell her to please give me the cold shoulder. No more pretending. My sanity can't take it.