Hi everyone. I haven't been on here in a while. I've been very busy lately, in a good way, and I think I'm moving past the point where I want to come on here and talk often. I just had some things on my mind, and considering the large amount of negative interactions I've had with others in the past, I thought I could vent here and maybe get some advice in case it's better or worse than I think it is.

To start, I've been in a relationship for a long time, over a year. We've had ups and downs. I'm just worried a bit about him. He's often on the computer, which is fine since I am too, but he has a lot of friends on there who he doesn't allow me to see the conversations of. Well, they're guys, and also friends, so I understand wanting to not let me know about the conversations. I would never complain about that-I want him to have privacy and his own life beyond me. I'm just worried about how much he tries to hide that life from me. He never lets me look at his conversations (not that I do-he hides them if I walk by or am nearby), he makes sure to log off when he leaves, and the logon is password protected. One time he he left his computer on by accident when he went out, and I, wrongly, took a look. I was very curious to know his inner computer life since he doesn't share much with me, and, er, I wanted to know his secret side. I saw normal "guy" conversations that I understand that he wouldn't want to show me. I did see he had interests he talked about that he never mentioned to me. Nothing wrong with that; I was wrong for looking. What made me sad was that he was talking to a girl about some relationship problems we had, showing anger at my short temper I was having at the time, and he had been calling her. The girl seemed nice, nothing wrong with what she did. She just answers him kindly and probably talked to him on the phone about it.

He's a smart guy, so I think he figured I looked, especially since I talked to him again about my temper lately and how sorry I was for putting him through that. I didn't want to make him feel that way, and I know what it's like to be on the receiving end of that. I haven't had the temper problem for about a month now, but I'm pursuing ways to keep it under control such as therapy. As for what I did, I was short-tempered and pushed him away one time, besides being distrusting of him such as saying he didn't seem to care when I was upset since he didn't seem to notice or help much. which really upset him.

Things are good now, and we seem to have forgiven each other, but is it normal for guys to have a female friend to complain about their relationship to? I'm just worried since I'm planning to live my life with him, and I don't want to make the wrong choice.

I might be over thinking this. I tend to do that.

Thanks for listening.

Hm, since I started writing here on my phone, he's been trying to check out what I'm writing, and I've been hiding it when he walks by. He doesn't look too happy, but hasn't said anything. It's kind of ironic. Although, I don't care if he hides stuff from me all that much. I do feel a bit guilty writing about him, although I wouldn't be if this wasn't anonymous.

[Trippin2.0]

If the guy girl friendship predates the romantic relationship he's *****ing about, then IME its not usually a problem. Boundaries and such have been set ages ago...


But, in the case where the guy girl friendship blossoms after the romance has begun... Well that could lead to emotional infidelity if lines get blurred.


And sometimes, people surprise us and don't follow the status quo at all.