[TishaBuv]

I've done that all my life and am almost always disappointed. I think more of people than they really are and I am always shocked that they are so below what I thought they were.

I was trying to help my friend with her business so she can get on her feet financially and I am shocked she is so awful. For example, instead of paying what she owes me, she tells me she won't have the money until she gets it from somewhere else.

Now I understand she is financially strapped, but you just don't do that when you are trying to establish good credit and value in people's eyes. She could have had a good thing with me, but now I will just back off from helping her.

[s4ndm4n2006]

As a person who's done this in the past and am not proud of it, I can say honestly I support your decision 100%. How can I say this being a person that has been in your friends' shoes?

Because I know, that as I have during years after my ex left me with responsibility of two kids and finances, that I have had to learn the hard way some very real facts related to these things. She probably had always, like me, had a fall back, a cushion by way of other people that never hold her accountable. it took having to fully rely on myself, and most recently a huge crisis to fully realize how irresponsible I've been.

As a person that's a bad manager of money (only til now hopefully) I think the best thing you can do for people like her and I is hold us accountable and not enable the responsibility irresponsibility anymore.

The only thing I can say to her credit and many people's that are this way is that there are many people who are afraid to hold others to standards trying to be nice and it makes it hard to learn how to manage money in a world where a quick way out is the standard for everyone.

*hugs* I hope you not helping her going forward will move her on down the road to better financial management in her life

[Fuzzybear]

[TishaBuv]

I gave her merchandise, she made a profit off it. All she had to do was not spend the money she owed me back. It was like a store having to pay their supplier. And she told me 'the check is in the mail'. It was just a little bit of money, so I don't care. But I could have helped her more and she blew it.

She has a gambling problem and can never hold onto money. If she has any, she spends it. And you're right, she always has people she goes to for money and always gets bailed out.

[TishaBuv]

Someone once asked in a post on here "How much do you trust?" And I answered "I only trust as much as I can afford to lose."