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Anonymous37878
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Confused Sep 07, 2016 at 03:56 AM
  #1
My ‘almost’ relationship disintegrated. I am hurt and left with a mountain of unaswered questions. I would like to know if you have experienced intense hurt in a relationship without receiving closure from the other party despite asking for some sort of explanation.

I also want to approach it from the other side: Have you ever been in the position that you knowingly/unknowingly hurt someone? Did you then just completely avoid that person?

I just want to move on, but I am really struggling.
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Default Sep 07, 2016 at 04:03 AM
  #2
Yes, I've very much been hurt by my (ex) husband when he left me.

I don't know if I'll ever get 'closure'.

Rather I'm exploring different avenues in my life that give me a sense of peace and enjoyment because I've come to 'accept' that it would never be with him.
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Talthybius
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Default Sep 07, 2016 at 05:33 AM
  #3
I still worry about my almost relation of 13 years ago. I still meander. I still imagine talking to her, asking her about her experiences and hoping to hear her true feelings.

The thing is, I feel one cannot express true feelings in initial stages of romance. You can never tell the other you are infatuated with them. You can never ask them what you did wrong. You can never ask them why they reject you. And they can never tell.

I suspect no failed relation or relation attempt ever has closure for both sides.

It's the only pain that remains. Your feelings for her or him, they will go away. Your self-doubt and regrets, they will stay.
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BrainFreeze
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Default Sep 07, 2016 at 10:04 AM
  #4
In my experience, sometimes you just process and come to the best conclusion you can make on your own. And make your peace with it that way. Eventually.
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Default Sep 07, 2016 at 10:48 AM
  #5
Yes, I learned very harshly that sometimes we have to create our own closure.


Acceptance plus perspective is key.

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Default Sep 07, 2016 at 11:19 AM
  #6
Quote:
Originally Posted by mermaid55555 View Post
My ‘almost’ relationship disintegrated. I am hurt and left with a mountain of unaswered questions. I would like to know if you have experienced intense hurt in a relationship without receiving closure from the other party despite asking for some sort of explanation.

I also want to approach it from the other side: Have you ever been in the position that you knowingly/unknowingly hurt someone? Did you then just completely avoid that person?

I just want to move on, but I am really struggling.
What kind of closure do you want? Sometimes we need to create the closure ourselves.
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Default Sep 07, 2016 at 11:36 AM
  #7
I think closure is a myth; an impossibly high expectation right up there with unconditional love, my one and only soul mate, and the perfect man or perfect woman. Ultimately what matters to you is you; you might consider not wallowing in sadness over a blighted relationship and instead better hone what it is you want and then seek it out.
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Default Sep 07, 2016 at 11:37 PM
  #8
I found this girl's videos a while back and maybe this will help? excuse the salty language though if it offends. It might not give you closure but it will give you something to think about. Sometimes...we don't get to find out the why's and the answers to our what if's...and it kind of sucks. I am definitely a 'thinker' and get too stuck in my own head about stuff.

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Anonymous37878
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Default Sep 08, 2016 at 02:22 AM
  #9
Thanks....

I guess it is a process, creating closure for yourself. Because it surely won't come from the other person. Time heals... probably
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Default Sep 08, 2016 at 02:25 AM
  #10
Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006 View Post
What kind of closure do you want? Sometimes we need to create the closure ourselves.
I actually just want to know how can you tell someone you love them and then steal from them. Yes actually rob them of their belongings.
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