Home Menu

Menu



advertisement
Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
Anonymous37878
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Confused Sep 07, 2016 at 03:56 AM
  #1
My ‘almost’ relationship disintegrated. I am hurt and left with a mountain of unaswered questions. I would like to know if you have experienced intense hurt in a relationship without receiving closure from the other party despite asking for some sort of explanation.

I also want to approach it from the other side: Have you ever been in the position that you knowingly/unknowingly hurt someone? Did you then just completely avoid that person?

I just want to move on, but I am really struggling.
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Crazy Hitch, Yours_Truly

advertisement
Crazy Hitch
ɘvlovƎ
 
Crazy Hitch's Avatar
 
Member Since Nov 2013
Location: Australia
Posts: 19,156 (SuperPoster!)
11
14.9k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 07, 2016 at 04:03 AM
  #2
Yes, I've very much been hurt by my (ex) husband when he left me.

I don't know if I'll ever get 'closure'.

Rather I'm exploring different avenues in my life that give me a sense of peace and enjoyment because I've come to 'accept' that it would never be with him.
Crazy Hitch is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Anonymous37878
 
Thanks for this!
Yours_Truly
Talthybius
Veteran Member
 
Member Since Mar 2016
Location: Europe
Posts: 565
8
Default Sep 07, 2016 at 05:33 AM
  #3
I still worry about my almost relation of 13 years ago. I still meander. I still imagine talking to her, asking her about her experiences and hoping to hear her true feelings.

The thing is, I feel one cannot express true feelings in initial stages of romance. You can never tell the other you are infatuated with them. You can never ask them what you did wrong. You can never ask them why they reject you. And they can never tell.

I suspect no failed relation or relation attempt ever has closure for both sides.

It's the only pain that remains. Your feelings for her or him, they will go away. Your self-doubt and regrets, they will stay.
Talthybius is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
BrainFreeze
New Member
 
Member Since Sep 2016
Location: California
Posts: 8
8
Default Sep 07, 2016 at 10:04 AM
  #4
In my experience, sometimes you just process and come to the best conclusion you can make on your own. And make your peace with it that way. Eventually.
BrainFreeze is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Trippin2.0
Legendary
 
Trippin2.0's Avatar
 
Member Since May 2010
Location: Cape Town South Africa
Posts: 11,937 (SuperPoster!)
14
600 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 07, 2016 at 10:48 AM
  #5
Yes, I learned very harshly that sometimes we have to create our own closure.


Acceptance plus perspective is key.

__________________


DXD BP1, BPD & OCPD

"The best way to make it through with hearts and wrists in tact, is to realise, two out of three aint bad" FOB...
Trippin2.0 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
s4ndm4n2006
s4ndm4n2006
Magnate
 
s4ndm4n2006's Avatar
 
Member Since Jul 2014
Location: limbo
Posts: 2,052
10
183 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 07, 2016 at 11:19 AM
  #6
Quote:
Originally Posted by mermaid55555 View Post
My ‘almost’ relationship disintegrated. I am hurt and left with a mountain of unaswered questions. I would like to know if you have experienced intense hurt in a relationship without receiving closure from the other party despite asking for some sort of explanation.

I also want to approach it from the other side: Have you ever been in the position that you knowingly/unknowingly hurt someone? Did you then just completely avoid that person?

I just want to move on, but I am really struggling.
What kind of closure do you want? Sometimes we need to create the closure ourselves.
s4ndm4n2006 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
IceCreamKid
Grand Magnate
 
Member Since Jan 2011
Location: Australia
Posts: 3,260
13
306 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Default Sep 07, 2016 at 11:36 AM
  #7
I think closure is a myth; an impossibly high expectation right up there with unconditional love, my one and only soul mate, and the perfect man or perfect woman. Ultimately what matters to you is you; you might consider not wallowing in sadness over a blighted relationship and instead better hone what it is you want and then seek it out.
IceCreamKid is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
Trippin2.0
fairydustgirl
Member
 
fairydustgirl's Avatar
 
Member Since Aug 2014
Location: usa
Posts: 355
10
36 hugs
given
Default Sep 07, 2016 at 11:37 PM
  #8
I found this girl's videos a while back and maybe this will help? excuse the salty language though if it offends. It might not give you closure but it will give you something to think about. Sometimes...we don't get to find out the why's and the answers to our what if's...and it kind of sucks. I am definitely a 'thinker' and get too stuck in my own head about stuff.

fairydustgirl is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Anonymous37878
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Sep 08, 2016 at 02:22 AM
  #9
Thanks....

I guess it is a process, creating closure for yourself. Because it surely won't come from the other person. Time heals... probably
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Anonymous37878
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default Sep 08, 2016 at 02:25 AM
  #10
Quote:
Originally Posted by s4ndm4n2006 View Post
What kind of closure do you want? Sometimes we need to create the closure ourselves.
I actually just want to know how can you tell someone you love them and then steal from them. Yes actually rob them of their belongings.
  Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Reply
attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 02:45 AM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2024, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.