[pryan96]

Can someone give me advice on how to apologize to a friend that I upset because of my BPD symptoms? I upset a friend due to my imagined fear of being abandoned by her and she doesn't believe that I'm sorry for what I did. I can't blame her though since I did something similar before this happened. Since then, I've been diagnosed with "other specified personality disorder with symptoms of BPD and schizotypal" and my BPD symptoms are the cause of my past behavior. The problem is that I feel as if I can't avoid mentioning that I have BPD, but I'm concerned that it might sound like I'm just excusing myself and not actually sorry for what I did. Other than the fact that I'm trying to find a therapist, I don't have much else to make my apology seem sincere and not just an excuse. Has anyone here felt with a situation like this before? I'm guilt ridden because of my behavior and depressed because of this. Any advice is appreciated.

[healingme4me]

I feel with apologies that a display of empathy needs to come out.
"I can see how (stated behavior) can cause (stated emotion). I'm so sorry for doing this, because I don't like feeling that way myself. I need to address this about myself. I hope in time to become mindful about my behaviors. And I hope in time you'll notice this change and can find forgiveness of me. I'm sorry for hurting you and creating this rift. I value our friendship and can understand if you need space from me."

[Michelea]

If I were the friend, I think what you are already thinking would be exactly what would help me understand and forgive the most. That, although you aren't using it as an excuse, your MI can be the source of your behavior at times.