[Delicious]

I've written before about my boyfriend, had the chance to break up with him but just couldn't, no words were coming out of my mouth. It was a horrible dramatic scene where I was made to look like the bad guy, confusing, as he contradicts by saying it's both my fault and not.

This chance came after I decided I was going to hang out with my one and only friend. He is male, so I do get the jealousy, however I find it to be excessive.

They've met before, we've hung out together, no problem. However, I stopped hanging out with him as much do to my boyfriend being here, which I wouldn't mind as much if he didn't through a fit every time I did.

During the 6-7 months that he's been here. I've only hung out with my friend 5 times without taking my boyfriend. Twice with him. So roughly once per month.

The fit always ends up being "You don't appreciate me, I feel like you don't love me, you prefer everyone before me, you don't understand you're the only person I've got here and you still go out."

It's true, he doesn't have friends here, and I get it's hard for some people to make friends (I know this very well!) but he's always taking pride in how easy it is for him to make friends with everyone, and talk to everyone, basically rubs it in (I'm pretty introverted) but hasn't even tried since he's been here. I spend every waking moment with him every day when I'm not working, but if I go out for a few hours I'm horrible.

I've noticed he does the same when I need to see my family, he gets so angry, and jealous, I don't understand.

Am I being selfish?

[s4ndm4n2006]

Originally Posted by Delicious

I've written before about my boyfriend, had the chance to break up with him but just couldn't, no words were coming out of my mouth. It was a horrible dramatic scene where I was made to look like the bad guy, confusing, as he contradicts by saying it's both my fault and not.

This chance came after I decided I was going to hang out with my one and only friend. He is male, so I do get the jealousy, however I find it to be excessive.

They've met before, we've hung out together, no problem. However, I stopped hanging out with him as much do to my boyfriend being here, which I wouldn't mind as much if he didn't through a fit every time I did.

During the 6-7 months that he's been here. I've only hung out with my friend 5 times without taking my boyfriend. Twice with him. So roughly once per month.

The fit always ends up being "You don't appreciate me, I feel like you don't love me, you prefer everyone before me, you don't understand you're the only person I've got here and you still go out."

It's true, he doesn't have friends here, and I get it's hard for some people to make friends (I know this very well!) but he's always taking pride in how easy it is for him to make friends with everyone, and talk to everyone, basically rubs it in (I'm pretty introverted) but hasn't even tried since he's been here. I spend every waking moment with him every day when I'm not working, but if I go out for a few hours I'm horrible.

I've noticed he does the same when I need to see my family, he gets so angry, and jealous, I don't understand.

Am I being selfish?

he sounds very manipulative and I'd venture to guess that his motivations are more possessiveness than anything else. To see your only friend maybe once a month isn't excessive, and his tantrums for this as little as you see your friend actually makes him the selfish one here.

[Delicious]

I have a feeling this is going to blow up this weekend. On monday is my friends birthday, and I plan to spend the day with him and his sister on saturday... We'll see how my guy reacts

[Bill3]

You are not being selfish.

He is being controlling.

He is also using emotional blackmail, 6 Warning Signs of Emotional Blackmail: Couples Counseling Tips

[ComfortablyNumb5]

I agree with everyone else. He's being controlling and trying to guilt trip you. He's obviously pretty jealous. When my bf and I first got together I told him I have mostly male friends and he can read my texts or whatever he wants. I even introduced him to one friend that has bipolar like me. My bf understands that I need support from my BP friend because he gets me. My bf doesn't have a MI so he knows I can't really talk to him and get understanding so in a way he's glad I have friends I can turn to.

So your dilemma is that you need to find a way to break up with him. I know it's hard but just sit him down and if you have to, hand him a letter. I've had to do that before. It's not the best route but with my anxiety, it helps. Good luck and keep us posted!