Toxic friendship? Wanting to end a friendship.

I want to end a friendship, but I don't know how. Background: we dated for 2 years (2009-2011), then became friends in 2012. It was confusing at first, but it worked because we were both single and weren't attracted to each other (yeah) but loved each other dearly. We were like companions. He got a girlfriend last spring, and our relationship changed. It had to. But it hurt me. And while he is still my friend, he never calls me anymore. But i am still attached to him I think, because sometimes I still call him when I'm not doing well, and need support. He actually nudged me to email my ex. :-O And then when i read him the response I got, he didn't think it was mean, just honest. I feel like....my friend is not good for me for the most part. Yes, he has his good points. But I feel like I am annoying and a burden more than anything toward him and his gf, who doesn't like me. I'm not even around that much anymore. But I think maybe this is a toxic friendship. Sometimes I feel more hurt than better when I interact with him, but I feel like, it's hard to stop because I'm soooo used to it and comfortable. But I want to respect myself!!!

He sounds like bad news.

Frankly he is your ex. You dated for 2 years. I fail to see how you weren't attracted to each other yet dated for two years. If you feel hurt by him having a girlfriend then it's not true friendship but rather ex relationship. Honestly I see why his gf might not want you around. I could see maybe you went on few dates and then decided to become friends, but two years? He is your ex. That's why he stopped calling when he found a gf. He maybe encouraged you to text the other guy in hopes you move on too.

As about ex and honesty. See if you asked the guys opinion and he responded it's one thing. But he gives you unsolicited opinion that pretty much says "you suck". No one asked his opinion. For your friend to say it's ok... is pretty much saying he is in agreement? That's not right coming from a friend?

Hang in there. You deserve good friendships and relationships. It doesn't sound good enough

If this so called friend doesn't call you, it will be easy to end. Just never call him either. It will just fade away. Hang in there. If friendship doesn't make you happy then there is no point

I am surprised he took that view on the response from your ex, but it's his opinion and sometimes people we care about do disappoint us. The thing I always think is there are so many times we can let disappointments like that go and move on before the negatives outweigh the positive, only you can know if you've passed the tipping point.

If I were you I'd give it a bit time and space if you can, you've had a bumpy time recently and maybe not best time to make a final decision, but whatever you choose I wish you peace with it.

Thanks Divine. I'm not going to get into the sexual attraction part. It's too private for me to share here atm. But thank you. Yeah, our friendship really ...it grew out of ur relationship, and I'd say it was never really a fully healthy one because if that, and because we were so close. We slept in the same bed as friends when I'd go over there. It was weird. I know this. I probably deluded myself into thinking it was just friendship. And yeah, this guy says insensitive stuff all the time to me, and we disagree a lot. It's not worth it to me to continue the friendship. It's just hard to end. I don't call him much lately. I know I need to fill my life with better things.

Thanks Prefabsprout. Honestly, I am sick of feeling badly, but also good around this person. It's pretty ingrained in me, the friendship. I don't know. I just wanted to thank you for your response and your support in general.

Sometimes I want to, but I'm probably not going to make the decision to cut him out of my life completely right now. I've had a lot of stress in my life lately. And I will probably just minimize contact even more, and also do things to make myself feel better, go to therapy, etc.

I have no advise other than to do what you feel comfortable and with and listen to your honest heart and mind. (((Hugs)))