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Nov 28, 2016 at 08:28 AM
#1
My attitude towards relationships has always been all or nothing. I take offence if people don't want to know everything about me like I do about them if they just learn to trust me enough to reveal themselves. I've never seen the point in small talk and banter, I've just eagerly awaited the moment when we start to really get to know each other. However, I've realised the world doesn't work like that.
I've realised I'm lucky to have a couple close friends with whom I can share 'everything'. The rest is more superficial. The thing is, I don't know how to be in those relationships! I'm like, what do I talk about - how do I relate to others in a more cavalier way? I just thought I'd write this down to stop these thoughts from aimlessly circling around in my head.. 
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 xRavenx
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Legendary
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 10,258
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Nov 28, 2016 at 08:35 AM
#2
Focus on the exchange of ideas with people, not just on personal info. Talk about things of interest to you both and let the finding all about each other just develop more slowly over time.
__________________ "And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!" . About Me--T |
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Grand Magnate
Member Since Sep 2015
Location: Michigan
Posts: 3,504
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Nov 28, 2016 at 02:48 PM
#3
Getting into deep convo such as discussing who you are, what are your fears, weaknesses, etc, takes a level of intimacy I believe. I wouldn't talk to someone about deep subjects unless they were open to do the same, and we know each other enough. Deep convo comes with time and work.
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 xRavenx
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Poohbah
Member Since Nov 2016
Location: NW Louisiana
Posts: 1,214
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Nov 28, 2016 at 03:07 PM
#4
Quote:
Quote:
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Grand Member
Member Since Jan 2015
Location: Europe
Posts: 852
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Nov 28, 2016 at 05:02 PM
#5
The weather? :P
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Nov 28, 2016 at 06:47 PM
#6
Haha, indeed, weather talk
Only problem is it wouldn't carry very far..What kinds of things do people here talk about with more distant friends/acquaintances? What's too personal? I just read the other day you should never start a conversation about religion or politics.. Thank you all for your replies, by the way, it really helps not having to ponder things on my own
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 22,894
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Nov 28, 2016 at 08:41 PM
#7
Books you read, movies you like, travels either where've been or like to go, places you visited like museums or festivals or theater etc hobbies, yours and other peoples etc
Too personal is asking why they are divorced or why they don't have children or about their sex life etc |
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