I am thinking this is obviously not a new thing. I am sure many many people have had to go through this.

I am attending a charity dinner next weekend raising money for my boyfriend's daughter (she is amidst a serious health crisis). It is important I attend alongside him. I have been given the heads up though that his ex, the daughter's mother, will be there and that her reaction to my presence may not be positive (note: I've heard about this woman repeatedly from multiple sources that she is very unstable and has a hair trigger). To tell you all the truth, i am quite anxious about this.

[MickeyCheeky]

It's understandable you feel like this Try to limit the contact with her as much as possible and focus on other people. Maybe this will help a little bit. Good luck

[Bill3]

Would you be able to discuss the anxiety with your boyfriend?

Both my H's exes were fine, one actually became a good friend of mine, the way I see it is we already had one thing in common. Was I nervous when I met them? A little. I remember I played it cool, stayed quiet (my nature anyway).

Keep it light is my advice, try to forget what you've heard about her (people will have their own agendas and biases).

As for your anxiety, what power does she actually have over you?

[Erebos]

Similar to prefab, I ignored what others said about my fellass ex and just acted as I would to anyone else I didn't know. We became good friends .

Hopefully everyone will remember why you have all gathered, that it's about their daughter, not points scoring.
Wish you all the best, try not to go there with any preconceptions, judge her only by what you see for yourself.

[Crazy Hitch]

Given the circumstances, your anxiety is completely reasonable.

Kuddos to you for pushing past this and going to this event. That shows true character.