Need some more advice...

I have been talking to a guy online from Hungary and it's gotten to the point where he's getting really obsessed with me. He gets anxious and scared when I don't get online and start talking to him exactly when I say I will, he and I talk everyday, sometimes for hours, with him staying up all night to do so, and he wants to do things all the time with me (i.e. playing video games together).

I'm thinking about setting up some boundaries but I don't know how to do it exactly. Any advice?

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[UPDATED: 4/30/2017]

LIFE IS TOO SHORT, TOO VALUABLE AND TOO PRECIOUS A THING TO WASTE!!

One approach would be to set time boundaries. For example, you will not speak after, say, 9:00 p.m. your time. You will not speak for more that X hours per day. You will try to be prompt but you do not promise to arrive at the exact minute that was agreed. You would tell him these boundaries.

If he gets anxious or scared, that is a problem for him to deal with.

Just say that you're busy sometimes and can't spend all your time online. Just cut back the amount of time you give.

Talk to him, and tell him what he is doing. I believe you had mentioned he had pretty intense anxiety so setting these boundaries may cause some drama.
This level of neediness can be quite draining.

Restrict online times to an hour in the morning, and Then however many hours your comfortable with in the evening.
Explain that just because your online it doesn't your always available to talk. If you need your own time to do stuff say so.
Also provide yourself a half hour window when you say you will contact him. But ensure that you do, or explain why you can't, or your going to risk triggering him.
Can I ask what happens if you don't go online when he is expecting you?

It simply isn't practical to be online constantly and if he is doing that what is he doing in order to live and be productive at his end.

If he isn't sleeping he isn't taking care of his mental health. This is something you could gently impress on him.

I suspect this level of anxiety and neediness wouldn't be limited to online. So it's something you need to get a handle on if he is planning on coming over.

What does he do when you aren't available, or need to. Change plans?
Just trying to get an idea of the behaviour your contending with.

( I want to add I think you might encounter a lot of these kinds of issues. With this young man.)

If you consistently allow his anxiety and/or fear to influence your behavior so that it is significantly different from what you prefer, then you are potentially allowing him to run your life by telling you that he is anxious.

Does he not work?

Most adults cannot be up all night as they have to get up for work. Most people can only be online here or there, not all day and night. It's perfectly reasonable to tell him that you are only available at XYZ time, you are unavailable after 10pm etc Look at both of your work schedules and check what time is the best and stick to it.

also if he says he wants to save money to come see you or get transferable type of career, he needs to get off the Internet (unless he is on there taking online courses) and start doing stuff, saving money etc.

How do you know he is from Hungary? This frightens me...are you sure he is?
If he is...just stop contact with the creep.
I get a creepy vibe from this.

He's from Hungary.....and he's NOT a creep.

MY BLOG IS NOW CONVENIENTLY LOCATED HERE!!
[UPDATED: 4/30/2017]

LIFE IS TOO SHORT, TOO VALUABLE AND TOO PRECIOUS A THING TO WASTE!!

Honestly, as an avid gamer myself, I can attest to the fact that some of the most amazing people that I've met have been through online gaming. In fact, back in 2011, I managed to scavenge enough money together to go to Blizzcon. I bought a Greyhound bus up to California to attend and endured 3 days bored out of my mind on that bus just to get there so I could meet my old World of Warcraft guildmates from back when I played that game avidly and I even slept in the same motel room as a few of them on the floor because I spent all of my money just getting there. I have some of the best memories of my life from that time period all from people that I met in a video game.

So yeah, what Artchic is doing is more common place than you might think. There are many people making friends or forming relationships with people from games or the internet from different states or even different countries. I don't have any advice different from what has already been given because I utterly suck with relationships, but I wish you well with this!

Thanks Darkness, my current partner, who I have known for over 3 years, been together for one, I met through online gaming.

To some of you this will no doubt prove your point, given his background and history.
However for us it has worked out well.

I have plenty of online gaming friends who have their fair share of issues but are all good people at the end of the day.
Serious gamers have shared c'mon interest and it has nothing to do with getting hooked up.
You can tell those idiots a mile away.
This isn't online dating, no one who is seriously gaming goes there with the intention of getting into a relationship.
It can happen. Not often but it can.
And sometimes it fizzles out just as gradually as it started.

So I am not worried in the same way I would be if it was someone from a dating site.
However,no one should be paying emotional pressure to anyone online. It's not healthy, it's unreasonable and she can't possibly adhere.
His anxiety and neediness handpicked almost as soon as they expressed an mutual desire to work this out, and that fore is a red flag.
But without knowing his behaviour I can't advise any further,assuming Art would even want me too.

All the best Art, take care hun.

Nothing wrong with being a gamer. My husband is a gamer. He talks to other gamers online, although most of them he know in real life. But he doesn't sit there Day and night. He works, has hobbies and other stuff to do. Also him and his gaming bodies figure out when and who is off and plan accordingly. No one gets mad that others are at work or sleep.

Also most people can't be on the phone for hours either. That's why I wonder how can he afford being up on the phone or games so much?

I am concerned that he is clingy.

He apparently is getting a great deal out of this relationship but what are you getting emotionally from it. Let him know your are concerned about him. Let him know you are concerned about you.

Are you wanting to stay in this relationship? Let him know that but you need to have it on your terms. If not you might have to break this off all together.

I agree with Bill3. He has some great ideas. Good luck setting boundaries. I hope everything works out for you.

Sometimes we get caught up in the online conversations & forget the time until we see the sun coming up the next morning. For a short time, being in contact with someone like that doesn't seem to bother but when we have a life beyond that, their demand for our time takes a toll & we end up having enough. Not always easy to back out of something we have seemed to be ok with. But there comes a point where we just have to say, I really don't have the time to dedicate to talking with you on the internet. My life has other demands that I have been ignoring & I just can't continue with the demands to be on the internet for these long periods of time. I would like to continue communicating but need to put these limits on my Internet time with you.......then give your boundaries:........

I had that happen one time. I managed for several weeks then it just got to demanding & I realized that I was also getting caught up in the long chats & getting nothing else in my life accomplished. It ended...right after that.