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#1
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So I am recently single after an eleven year relationship and marriage. He was my best friend and I messed up some things and he did too. I had been sitting in my house for two weeks sad and lonely and honestly kinda waiting to die. I never dreamed that him and I would grow in such opposite directions.
I posted on someone else’s post a few minutes ago and said that I had been trying so hard to regulate my feelings. I didn’t want to miss him, didn’t want to be so miserable but when I gave myself permission to feel...things have gotten bearable again. Not to say that I am not hurting but I know today that I am going to make it. I pray for him but the reality is that we are toxic to one another. I’m walking in faith today. Not a religious faith but a faith in myself. I have been called a child who refuses to grow up, but that’s only because I haven’t had to. I’ve had very structured living for all of my adult life. It’s only been lately that I look in the mirror and say to myself, “we have one thing to accomplish today!” Reality is that I have so much to accomplish but I’m only able to do one thing at a time anyways so why complicate things with myself. Two weeks ago my husband left and I had nothing. I was too embarrassed to talk to my family or to ask them for help. I literally had no money, nothing. My vehicle died the day before and I was so broken and ashamed. I slowly started letting people in, and on Wednesday I started back with my counselor. I’ve sold almost everything in my house of any value but tomorrow I get to go get another vehicle. The woman whose selling it to me is giving me a great deal. She knows I’m going through a hard time and she gave me a break. I’m sure the grieving process will have more bumps in the road. But I feel like I have found my inner strength to get through it.
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Hope is a beautiful gift. |
![]() Bill3, healingme4me, MickeyCheeky, Sunflower123, WishIWereAStone
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#2
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I’m so sorry you are going through all this.
Grieve the loss and be kind to yourself.
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Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
![]() WoundedGirl
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![]() WoundedGirl
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#3
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I have had problems dealing with grief in the past and I think this situation is going to change all that. Thanks.
__________________
Hope is a beautiful gift. |
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