[seesaw]

This seems a little off to me. My hackles are raising...Anyone else?

"Hi how are you doing? ...i hope you have great plans for the weekend ...i am orginally Russian, single ...Just moved into america few months ago...i am an interior decorating expert ...i deal mostly on contracts internationally for hôtels and State houses. I was also à former movie actor back in Russia but i came to america to improve in english and to join the movie industry hère after handling some contracts which i have now..i live in fleming island fl. I live in an apartment with my dog his name is hush. I came across your profile i must say its capturing and i love it you are very beautiful..i had a contract and i am leaving tommorow to sweden its one of my biggest contracts ...hère is my number XXXXXXXXXi use à blackBerry phone and the whatsapp stopped working for à while but i use hangout its also cool since We can chat and make calls through it because i am going to be out of the country for the contract and my line Will be expensive to call or text with and i really want to keep in touch.hère is my hangout id we can talk anytime"

Here's why...if he wants to be an actor why did he come to America and come to a po-dunk town in Florida?

Why didn't he settle in Los Angeles or New York?

Also the traveling to Sweden and other places and giving me his number right off the bat....What, he's not going to have WiFi in Sweden?

I'm trying not to discriminate just because he may be foreign-born. But I think my concerns are legit?

[LittleEarthquakes]

It does seem a bit off. I would ask him these questions. Who knows, maybe he has good reasons.

[divine1966]

It’s a scam. Soon he’ll start love bombing you and then will ask for money. Know for experience. Block him

[FallDuskTrain]

yes. your concerns are valid. he sounds very odd. he has revealed too much information in such a short time.... just in one message... does not make much sense. Why is he giving his number to you right away? lost of odd things in this one message... Why is he telling you that he was an actor? And now he is an expert in interior design? Why do you need all this information about someone you just met? Weird.
Also, a thought: do you have his real name? you can research and see if he really was an actor in Russia.

[seesaw]

Yeah, see I could ask those questions, but I'm worried it will lead to unwanted contact.

I have an email address that he provided. I could search his name based on that. I'm also just not into the whole life story shared at once kind of thing. I mean, I'm okay with a long first message if it's like, hey, I saw you liked such and such writer. Me too! What did you think of his latest book... and so on...like actually starting a conversation.

This seems more like an odd proposition than a "Get to know you" message.

I dunno. I feel icky.

Seesaw

If you feel icky, stay away from him. That tells you all you need to know.

[Open Eyes]

He loaded his email with a lot of bait to make you see him as a possible good catch. Plus, he made it a point to be all about himself in that email and not very much about "you" other than he said you are attractive. IMHO, what he has already told you in that message is "I am all about me".

Yes. This message raised red flags for me.

[Patagonia]

If he has a pic I’d do a reverse google image search. This email sounds like something cut & pasted, like it could be addressed to anyone really.
Yup, sounds too weird! I wouldn’t give out any numbers.

[scorpiosis37]

It’s a scam. He is no doubt copy-pasting that message to a slew of potential targets and waiting to see who will bite. And Divine is right. The next step will be love bombing you and then asking for money. I would stay away. There are sooooo many tells in that message. He’s probably really in Nigeria.

[FallDuskTrain]

Curious: what is the area code of the phone number he shared w you? Or is it an Internet number?

[scorpiosis37]

Just to add one more red flag: look at all those accents he used. Those are used in the Romance languages, like French and Italian. They are NOT used in Russian, or Swedish for that matter. Russian uses an entirely different alphabet. His grammatical mistakes/oddities are also not typical of someone whose first language is Russian.

[hvert]

Yep, scam. Even if it's not, why is he reaching out to someone on a dating site the day before he leaves? I'd block and report.

[seesaw]

Wow, so I thought I was being like prejudicial or something because the Russian thing concerned me. Well really the new citizen thing, combined with the oddness of the message, concerned me.

But y'all have eased my mind that I'm calling this correctly.

I've moved on. I didn't respond and I won't.

Thank you all.

Seesaw

[divine1966]

Good job figuring it out and not responding!

[seesaw]

Originally Posted by divine1966

Good job figuring it out and not responding!

You know, it's funny. I see red flags, and I want to recognize them and honor them, but then I'm worried that I'm doing something wrong by honoring the red flags. I feel like this is a woman thing. Like we're conditioned to accept things that make us uncomfortable. Actually, there was a good blog post about this recently... and it rings true for me today.

Originally Posted by seesaw

You know, it's funny. I see red flags, and I want to recognize them and honor them, but then I'm worried that I'm doing something wrong by honoring the red flags. I feel like this is a woman thing. Like we're conditioned to accept things that make us uncomfortable. Actually, there was a good blog post about this recently... and it rings true for me today.

This is interesting that you bring it up. Honoring the red flags is a way to honor ourselves as women. And in US culture, women are really not honored, and we do learn to have to at least swallow a lot of degrading cultural norms. We may protest and speak up, but it's forever present.

[seesaw]

Originally Posted by golden_eve

This is interesting that you bring it up. Honoring the red flags is a way to honor ourselves as women. And in US culture, women are really not honored, and we do learn to have to at least swallow a lot of degrading cultural norms. We may protest and speak up, but it's forever present.

Yeah, and strangely enough, I'm having a conversation with what seems to be a nice guy online and he just insulted my intelligence. Like got a total chip on his shoulder and insulted me, calling me "silly," because I don't know all the ins and outs of his field, and I'm being nice and asking him questions about what he does for a living.

I am pretty sure that if I tried to explain to him the ins and outs of what I do, he wouldn't be able to follow along. I am a badas$ business woman who is killing it as her own boss. I don't need some man talking down to me because we don't work in the same field and I'm trying to get to know him. WTF?

Yeah, moving on. I have no reason to settle or put up with bullshyte.

Seesaw

Originally Posted by seesaw

Yeah, and strangely enough, I'm having a conversation with what seems to be a nice guy online and he just insulted my intelligence. Like got a total chip on his shoulder and insulted me, calling me "silly," because I don't know all the ins and outs of his field, and I'm being nice and asking him questions about what he does for a living.

I am pretty sure that if I tried to explain to him the ins and outs of what I do, he wouldn't be able to follow along. I am a badas$ business woman who is killing it as her own boss. I don't need some man talking down to me because we don't work in the same field and I'm trying to get to know him. WTF?

Yeah, moving on. I have no reason to settle or put up with bullshyte.

Seesaw

Good for you on all fronts! Never settle, especially when it comes to dealing with total BS from someone.

[DanceEngine7]

Is that match.com?
That's a re written copy and pasted message all the women get. What does his picture look like?
I stay far away from messages like that. Its almost like someone from a foreign country trying to spam you or something. ewwwhhh

[scorpiosis37]

Glad to hear you didn’t respond. You might also want to report him to the site so that other women who may be more vulnerable don’t get caught up in the scam.

[divine1966]

I bet he (or they as scammers work in teams) already took a profile down. They make a contact and then close profiles so no one can report them. Scammers virtually never get caught

[bunnyhabit]

if he be rich and handsome could enjoy be with him. just careful no get taken by him make you do things hurt you. condom or blood test before do sex for sure.

[divine1966]

Originally Posted by bunnyhabit

if he be rich and handsome could enjoy be with him. just careful no get taken by him make you do things hurt you. condom or blood test before do sex for sure.

Rich and handsome?

[scorpiosis37]

Originally Posted by bunnyhabit

if he be rich and handsome could enjoy be with him. just careful no get taken by him make you do things hurt you. condom or blood test before do sex for sure.

The person (or people) who e-mailed are not the guy in the photo. They’re scammers who live half way across the world.