[MatBell]

Hi everyone.
I just wanted to write about this, I hope some of you are in a similar situation.

I just feel really sorry for my mom and her situation breaks my heart. I just talked to her today. She lives alone and has had mental problems for most of her life. I only got to understand the extent of it as I got older. She was molested by her father when she was young and that's probably where it all started.

She has been in a lot of trouble, all kinds of health problems and been in a subscription pill addiction for several years that also affected me when I was younger and probably started my own depressive episodes.

She is living on a shoestring budget, in and out of jobs, and only has her mother to help and support her. She has done so much for her always, physically, emotionally and financially.

So now I heard that she just had to quit a job she was in for only two days. It was a menial warehouse job that took a toll on a physically. It just broke my heart hearing this having to do this job at her age.

Luckily she doesn't succumb to self-pity and usually have a good attitude - when I talk to her in any case. However, it still gets me sad.

This isn't the first time I feel like this. Not at all. But I wish I could do something for her that would make her happy, do something to fix things a bit. She has had such a hard, difficult life and it hurts to see as her son. I would just like to make the time she has left good. She so deserves it. I hope I won't be racked with guilty and sorrow when she's gone thinking back on her life. I fear that a bit.

I just wanted to get these thoughts down. Maybe you have some advice or can relate to it with your family members or friends.

[Skeezyks]

[Imokay2]

As a mom myself, I can say what makes me feel alright, and that things can be ok is knowing my kids are alright, seeing them accomplishing even simple goals is really rewarding to me, it does give me hope to see them learning to drive, having a job, doing well enough in school, being healthy enough.
When I see that I think all this was worth it. And realize that they, the future are what its all about.
I have to say, your post made me cry, because I think sometimes, even though I try to keep it hidden, my kids pick up on these things too.
We can't change the past, or carry someone else's burden for them, but knowing that you care and you are making it, is probably just as rewarding for her. Good son.