My parents live about 80 miles from me. Unfortunately I do not have a very good relationship with my mother and therefore I stay away from her and avoid contact as much as possible. However, I am quite close to my father and we have a positive relationship.

This past summer my dad turned 60. It hit me that he is not going to live forever. I don't spend much time with him because of the situation with Mom. It's difficult with him married to Mom and living over an hour away. If I lost my dad tomorrow, I would regret that I have not spent as much time with him as I would have liked.

Every now and then I think about him and feel like the weeks and months are just flying by. I am missing valuable time with him. When I do see him my mom is usually there too which means I am nervous and not my usual self. Physically my dad and I may see each other but with Mom there it's barely worth it.

I have seen several posts here from those of you who struggle with the holidays. I do too. The one positive for me is being able to spend them with Dad even though I have some not so good relationships with others.

Just wanted to share my frustration.

[bebop]

hon time spent with anyone you love is worth it. my dad is 78 and not in good health. I love him and try to spend as much time as possible with him. he has another wife other than my mom but we get along great. mom was never good. call your dad.

[sabby]

I agree with bebop! Call your dad!!

Life is too short to stand in the shadows Airway. Sometimes in order to be with the ones we love, we have to put up with those that make our lives difficult too. I know it's not easy.....boy do I know it. But I sure don't want you to have any regrets when the time comes. That would make the situation so much more difficult don't you think?

Maybe you can call dad and have him meet you somewhere for lunch or dinner, just the 2 of you. Call it your special "father/daughter" time! I'll bet he would love it and that way you could have him all to yourself for a few hours

Hugssss
sabby

Thank you bebop, and sabau.

I can't imagine calling my dad and my mom NOT asking to speak to me. Since I never know who will pick up the other end, I have avoided this method of communication. My dad uses email regularly at home, and as far as I know he is the primary user of it. Mom doesn't generally check the email. So perhaps this is a better approach than the telephone.

I would love to be able to call my dad but he died eighteen years ago..............

[sabby]

There you go Airway....email away! When push comes to shove...there are always ways to get done what you need to do.

Hugsss
sabby

[bebop]

airway yeah I understand. you do need to keep in touch with him.