Overbearing mother? stress :(

Ok so i am 18 years old and my mother is completely against me drinking or smoking weed. I live in canada so I am at the legal drinking age and weed will be legalized soon... but we have addiction in our family and my father was an addict so she thinks all forms of drinking or smoking is bad. especially for me since I take Prozac for my anxiety and depression. We have screaming fights with me feeling misunderstood and her feeling hurt. I'm just going through a lot and she doesn't help my mental health but I also wish she understood that I just want to be a typical teenager. I get she fears for my safety but the fact she seems to be completely against for me, doesn't feel fair. Maybe she is right and I'm asking too much of her. She also has health issues so i don't like putting her under stress. just don't want to hurt her anymore but also don't want to fight and i want to be able to have freedom within reason with drinking and smoking. not in excessive of course. i just really need some advice please

I’d say that when you live in your own place and pay your own bills, then you are free to drink and smoke. I certainly don’t think you should do that especially mixing it with meds, I am just saying that you COULD.

While you are under your parents roof, you need to live by their rules within reason. Their rules of not drinking or getting high are within reason.

Also keep in mind that alcohol is a depressant. You take anti depressant meds but then you follow by drinking a depressant. It’s not logical.

Weed is illegal. The fact that it WILL be legal doesn’t make it legal now.

In young age (any age but young is worse) drinking and getting high leads to poor decisions making. I’d talk to your doctor (who prescribed you
Meds) about what he/she thinks of substance you use.

What else do you like to do? Hobbies? Sports? Are you in school? Working?

That is true and I do want to respect my mother's rules. In terms of anti depressant meds and alcohol, that's correct. Poor decision making, yeah true again. I don't feel like I'll be unhappy if I don't get to drink or smoke just that sometimes it can be fine if it's in moderation of course or in a safe place. As for now it's probably not the best idea. I love to write, paint and read and I'm attending Uni in the fall. Looking for a summer job currently.

Good luck with summer job and your hobbies!

I'm glad you understood your mother's feelings Perhaps, if she's still hurt, you could talk this out with her.

Sorry if this is something you've tried, I see no indication of it being the case here though. Basically I'm thinking sit her down, say "I'd like to talk about something and I need you to listen to me say what I need to say before you talk, ok?" Get that confirmation of "yes" before you go into it, if she tries to get the topic out of you or is argumentative at first then you can persist and even decide not to talk about it until she's ready to be receptive. Because I struggle socially I'd have a list prepared of what I want to say and practice it first, you may or may not choose to do so. The key thing for you I think would be reminding her that you are aware of the risks and that you are not interested in going overboard, you just want to know what those things are like and you might not even like them. You may have said these things during an argument, but people are generally not receptive when they're emotionally high, so talking to her calmly might do better.

Regardless of how the conversation goes, it's still probably better for you to wait until you're out on your own to try these things, otherwise you risk her giving you a hard time.

I agree with waiting until you live on your own when it comes to serious issues your mother has concerns with. Typical teenager stuff leads to typical problems. Maybe think about how you can strive for better than typical? Think how much better your life will be if you aim for better than that.