[mbrpcv]

My boyfriend of over a year recently and suddenly broke off our relationship that, at least I thought, was deepening and quite serious. When he indicated he was unhappy and rethinking our relationship because he felt I didn't recognize his non-verbal cues that he was sad, I admit that I was shocked because it seemed out of the blue and I felt it was a rather small thing to break up over. I fear that I may have triggered his childhood abandonment and abuse issues by getting angry with him which only drove him away further. He has now become quite cold and callous and is like a different person in our communication. I have apologized a number of times and told him I wanted to try to work things out. I am not sure how to show him that I really do want us to learn to communicate better and that I won't abandon him as so many others in his life has.

I'm looking for advice as to the best approach to let him know I am there for him and love him. Should I give him space or continue to reach out to him even if he doesn't respond? And also advice as to whether people with abandonment issues who shut out people who they feel hurt by ever soften and let the person back in again, or is that unlikely and I already lost my one chance with him?

From my perspective everything seemed to be going so well so it really came out of the blue for me. I'm just so confused.

[crushed_soul]

I wish for you to be well, mbrpcv. In my humble perspective, more info would be needed to try to elucidate upon any of the content that you've shared thus far, but I am not asking you to divulge more (that is your decision.) Also, I think that any attempt to reply to your questions would also be somewhat based on more disclosure of your relationship.

[divine1966]

I am so sorry you are hurting.

If he broke up with you, as sad as it is, it’s wise to give him space and not try to change his mind. I’d especially be careful if he doesn’t respond as it could be just perceived wrong. Continue pursuing people when they don’t respond could be seen as harassment

I’ve been in situations few times in life when I ended relationships, but men continued pursuing me because THEY wanted to work it out. They didn’t respect my reasons for break up.

It might appear sudden to you but it might not be sudden for him. Regardless of the reason for break up, he made that choice. It’s probably better to grieve, process it and then move on. Good luck