[RubySapphire]

Hey, very recently I went clubbing with my girlfriend of 3 years and a couple of friends’ friends.

She and I have been wanting to explore a third person for a long time and we decided to go home with one of the friends’ friends, I’ll call him V.

Note: I’m aware of the risks involved in including a third person, I don’t need to be told that or judged for it.

After having a few drinks, my girlfriend was very very drunk and we all had our time together and I was fine, but the problem is when we were going to bed together (sleeping).

I was laying there and found them kissing, and touching each other. I later there quietly thinking ok, this is ok. But then they continued without including me. It was only when V said.

“Hey, we really shouldn’t be doing this because RubySapphire is asleep.”

I was shocked that they were doing all this thinking I was asleep. I felt betrayed by my girlfriend when she asked if I was asleep and that she didn’t consider me for a moment. Only V did.

I told them I was awake and V tried to make the moves on me, I rejected him. Telling him I wasn’t in the mood. They both kissed a bit again and then he asked me to leave the room so he could have sex with my girlfriend.

I said yes it was okay because I felt I was holding them back, before leaving to a spare room. Half an hour passed until my girlfriend bothered to check on me.

This isn’t the first time boundaries have been stepped over, at a party I wasn’t at, she flirted with a man while drunk and our friend pulled her away from him.
The next day, my girlfriend confessed this to me.

I’m always concerned I am overreacting, I want to hear people’s opinions on it. Am I? Or am I right that I’m not being put first at all?

[MickeyCheeky]

I'm not sure I understand... they wanted to have sex and you agreed to it? Anyway, they were drunk, so obviosuly they weren't thinking straight... so if you want to avoid this kind of situation just be careful when she goes out for a party.

[RubySapphire]

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I'm not sure I understand... they wanted to have sex and you agreed to it? Anyway, they were drunk, so obviosuly they weren't thinking straight... so if you want to avoid this kind of situation just be careful when she goes out for a party.

They already started before they even asked me, that’s my issue. My girlfriend went and did stuff with him while they assumed I was sleeping. Our friend knew it was wrong but my girlfriend did not care.

Also I feel I shouldn’t have to be careful about it, I can’t always be there for parties and worry that she is flirting with some guy. I want to be able to trust that she isn’t going to do that and I shouldn’t have to always be present to make sure.

I feel that your girlfriend betrayed you for kissing and touching him while thinking you were asleep. She should have waited or held off. That wasn’t right to do and I think you have a right to feel upset by it. I also would feel mistrustful if that were me in that situation.