There is this woman next door and she waters her wonderful garden.

Now. I have made contact. We talk briefly but I feel that she has been through a lot of betrayal...I picked that word because I can see me sometimes when looking at her.

I want to be FRIENDS so bad.

How about I get her a plant for her garden? For her, seeing how special she is but hasn't got a clue on her charm and beauty.

Would Steve get rejected. I can handle rejection if I'm being inappropriate

[WishfulThinker66]

Well Steve this really depends on things. Have you done anything thus far that might make her feel uncomfortable or feel that she is being watched. Because whatever you do you can't risk making her feel that way.

Assuming this is not so then I do feel that a plant would be a nice gesture. It is also a great way to initiate conversation. You might even do so before you get the plant. You could let her know you'd like to do so and ask for her input in what would best be appropriate and what she would appreciate. What a marvelous way to open up a dialogue with her. There are ways this can be done without making her feel all creepy.

(BTW, your post put a big smile on my face. There are certainly worse predicaments one could be in, eh? I defintely will be checking back.)

[MickeyCheeky]

I think it would be very nice, megabytesteve. Of course there's no way to know for sure how she would react. But I don't see any reason why she shouldn't like this gesture. So I'd say go for it! Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you

[sarahsweets]

What's the worst that could happen? She says no thank you and you go about your business.

[Miss P]

Not Knowing (for me) would be worst....try it, if it doesn’t happen, you ventured, huh?

Hugs n best of luck!

[eskielover]

I know as a single woman living alone I would feel awkward if a neighbor guy came even with a plant for no reason. My neighbor on the farm across the street brought me yummy jam to thank me for receiving a package that had been shipped to them while they were away.

If someone is new to the area (even if you), getting a plant would be a nice gesture to say....hey I am your neighbor & if you need any help with anything I can give you a hand (kinda a nice way to introduce yourself)

Sometimes it is better to just talk with a neighbor than to get gift giving into the picture since you don't know whether she might feel that even a plant gift may come with more expectations behind it.

Maybe just talk more with her & get to know her. Then around spring take a plant & say thought this would be nice for your garden.

Just coming the perspective of a single older lady.

[lizardlady]

Steve, I'm going to echo Eskie. Take some time to get to know this woman. I would find it kind of odd if a guy I'd only spoken to once bought me a plant. Get to know her a bit and let her get to know you. Like Eskie suggested, maybe get her a plant when spring comes around.

[Buffy01]

Originally Posted by megabytesteve

There is this woman next door and she waters her wonderful garden.

Now. I have made contact. We talk briefly but I feel that she has been through a lot of betrayal...I picked that word because I can see me sometimes when looking at her.

I want to be FRIENDS so bad.

How about I get her a plant for her garden? For her, seeing how special she is but hasn't got a clue on her charm and beauty.

Would Steve get rejected. I can handle rejection if I'm being inappropriate

How about saying hello I am your neighbor?

Originally Posted by eskielover

I know as a single woman living alone I would feel awkward if a neighbor guy came even with a plant for no reason. My neighbor on the farm across the street brought me yummy jam to thank me for receiving a package that had been shipped to them while they were away.

If someone is new to the area (even if you), getting a plant would be a nice gesture to say....hey I am your neighbor & if you need any help with anything I can give you a hand (kinda a nice way to introduce yourself)

Sometimes it is better to just talk with a neighbor than to get gift giving into the picture since you don't know whether she might feel that even a plant gift may come with more expectations behind it.

Maybe just talk more with her & get to know her. Then around spring take a plant & say thought this would be nice for your garden.

Just coming the perspective of a single older lady.

Thank you. This creates boundaries for me.

Originally Posted by lizardlady

Steve, I'm going to echo Eskie. Take some time to get to know this woman. I would find it kind of odd if a guy I'd only spoken to once bought me a plant. Get to know her a bit and let her get to know you. Like Eskie suggested, maybe get her a plant when spring comes around.

Ok talking to get to know here. I'm currently outside...kinda waiting ... but I'm also on my tablet enjoying a few beer's

[Albatross2008]

There is, of course, no one approach that works with all women. The only thing we can do is project ourselves into the situation and speculate how we would feel. Especially if, as you suspect, she's already been through some stuff, she might feel intimidated if you come on too fast. (You also don't want to move too slowly, and let the chance slip by. It's a balancing act.) Start by smiling and waving, tell her your name, and see how she responds to that. If you happen by as she's gardening, you might compliment the job she's doing and ask her a question about her plants.

Originally Posted by megabytesteve

There is this woman next door and she waters her wonderful garden.

Now. I have made contact. We talk briefly but I feel that she has been through a lot of betrayal...I picked that word because I can see me sometimes when looking at her.

I want to be FRIENDS so bad.

How about I get her a plant for her garden? For her, seeing how special she is but hasn't got a clue on her charm and beauty.

Would Steve get rejected. I can handle rejection if I'm being inappropriate

speculation. you see what you want to see. Whatever supports your hope that she is like you, and by extension may identify with you.

[divine1966]

You never talked to a person but you already assume she had betrayals. How do you know?