Hate when I make an idiotic comment without thinking

ducky2030 · Mar 22, 2019 at 11:29 PM

I was having a phone interview. The interviewer explains that the training program is sponsored by the company, the company is paying for the student. I proceed to ask do they offer job assistance?

worst possible thing I could say when she just explained the company is paying FOR THE STUDENT....of course their not going to pay for you to get a job somewhere else. I knew this and yet I STILL ASKED THE QUESTION!!! I have had issues like this lately where I say or ask something really obvious or say something that is clearly not the right thing to say. Im not sure how to control this. Its like deep down I know what to say but I can't access the right words and just blurt out whatever! ...and then regret it later. anybody have any tips for this!lol

~Christina · Mar 23, 2019 at 01:52 AM

Breath 3 times before speaking , usually allows your brain to process things

divine1966 · Mar 23, 2019 at 04:58 AM

Prepare questions ahead of time and only ask those. Ask the rest some other time. If asked “do you have questions” take a little pause...like previous poster says breathe or count till 5 (not loudly) before speaking

Do you struggle with anxiety? Or anything else? Blurt things because you are nervous? My husband interviews horribly. One time he told me what he was saying at one interview, and I was like what??? Luckily he is hired for his job skills not his interview skills! When he gets comfortable then he does not blurt things as he does well at work but when he meets people the first time, interview etc it’s entirely different story. Granted he has Tourettes and OCD, that’s why I wondered if you have anxiety

MickeyCheeky · Mar 23, 2019 at 05:16 AM

I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, artsygirl88

I agree with what all the others have already wisely said better than I ever could. You've been given some great advice on this thread. I'd suggest to follow it if you can. Please don't be so hard on yourself. It's not your fault. I agree with divine1966 about preparting your questions in advance! I also agree with ~Christina about counting up to three or five seconds before making any additional questions! That should help you a bit, especially on the phone! I'm sure you'll get better at it. It takes a lot of practice. Please don't give up! You can do this! I believe in you! We all believe in you! We're all rooting for you! Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you, artsygilr88! I'm sure you can make it! Just try to do your best! That's all you can do after all! I'm sure you'll be able to get through all of this! You're a strong, wonderful person!

ducky2030 · Mar 23, 2019 at 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by divine1966

Prepare questions ahead of time and only ask those. Ask the rest some other time. If asked “do you have questions” take a little pause...like previous poster says breathe or count till 5 (not loudly) before speaking

Do you struggle with anxiety? Or anything else? Blurt things because you are nervous? My husband interviews horribly. One time he told me what he was saying at one interview, and I was like what??? Luckily he is hired for his job skills not his interview skills! When he gets comfortable then he does not blurt things as he does well at work but when he meets people the first time, interview etc it’s entirely different story. Granted he has Tourettes and OCD, that’s why I wondered if you have anxiety

I dont think I have anxiety in general day to day events but, in situations like this yes definitely or anything else that puts me on the spot where I know I'm being judged or critiqued! I also drink coffee which does not help! lol So yes I need write down all my questions and answers and don't say anything else except that!!

ducky2030 · Mar 23, 2019 at 03:36 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MickeyCheeky

I'm so sorry you're hurting so much, artsygirl88

I agree with what all the others have already wisely said better than I ever could. You've been given some great advice on this thread. I'd suggest to follow it if you can. Please don't be so hard on yourself. It's not your fault. I agree with divine1966 about preparting your questions in advance! I also agree with ~Christina about counting up to three or five seconds before making any additional questions! That should help you a bit, especially on the phone! I'm sure you'll get better at it. It takes a lot of practice. Please don't give up! You can do this! I believe in you! We all believe in you! We're all rooting for you! Remember that we're here for you if you need it. Feel free to PM me anytime. Let me know if I can do something to help you. Wish you good luck! Let us know how it goes. Sending many hugs to you, artsygilr88! I'm sure you can make it! Just try to do your best! That's all you can do after all! I'm sure you'll be able to get through all of this! You're a strong, wonderful person!

Thanks for the support! I really dont have anyone that understands these types of struggles in my life

Mar 26, 2019 at 06:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by artsygirl88

I was having a phone interview. The interviewer explains that the training program is sponsored by the company, the company is paying for the student. I proceed to ask do they offer job assistance?

worst possible thing I could say when she just explained the company is paying FOR THE STUDENT....of course their not going to pay for you to get a job somewhere else. I knew this and yet I STILL ASKED THE QUESTION!!! I have had issues like this lately where I say or ask something really obvious or say something that is clearly not the right thing to say. Im not sure how to control this. Its like deep down I know what to say but I can't access the right words and just blurt out whatever! ...and then regret it later. anybody have any tips for this!lol

I can relate to not being able to come up with the right words (especially with my social anxiety). Don't be too hard on yourself though. The person on the other end probably did not think anything of it. He probably talks to so many people on the phone in one day, and is used to routinely answering any professional question that come his way. You didn't talk about anything that is non-job related, so you are fine.

If you are really worried (and if this is an option) you can say,

"You know, I can't think of any question for now, but can I email you if I think of something?"

This way, you have some time to formulate your question in writing.

Fuzzybear · Mar 26, 2019 at 07:02 PM

Mar 26, 2019 at 07:20 PM

I think everybody does this at least once in a while and I think most people are pretty forgiving of it. I think it’s ok to laugh it off or even apologize if need be. Sometimes I’ll just say something like “Oh yeah, you just explained that. I got sidetracked.” People usually understand. I know that some people will be judgmental but ignore them. They’re not perfect either. I feel a bit embarrassed at times when I say something really silly and it’s no fun to feel that way. Like Dr. Seuss said “those who mind don’t matter and those who don’t do.” Something like that and I’m sure I’ve messed up the quote but you know what I mean.

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~Christina Legendary Wise Elder Community Liaison Member Since Jul 2011 Location: Tennessee Posts: 22,450 (SuperPoster!) 13 12.7k hugs given	Mar 23, 2019 at 01:52 AM #2 Breath 3 times before speaking , usually allows your brain to process things __________________ Helping others gets me out of my own head ~
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Fuzzybear Wisest Elder Ever Member Since Nov 2002 Location: Cave. Posts: 96,474 (SuperPoster!) 22 81.4k hugs given	Mar 26, 2019 at 07:02 PM #8 __________________
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