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Old Oct 12, 2019, 08:16 AM
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shakespeare47 shakespeare47 is offline
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Member Since: Jul 2014
Location: US
Posts: 3,154
I've been obsessing about this conversation I had with a new acquaintance who is a manager at a homeless shelter where I volunteer.


New Acquaintance (N): [She is talkative and upbeat- after talking we realized we live in the same city.] I have a booth at all the festivals.

Me (M): Cool! Do guys have fried green tomatoes?

N: We do!

M: I've always wanted to try them. I'll stop by for the festival this weekend.
I did stop by, and was embarrassed that I didn't quite remember what she looked like (my wife accuses me of being face-blind). I bought some of the fried green tomatoes and ate most of them- I shared some with my family.
The next time I saw her I was in the middle of an interview with another manager regarding some training we had just completed.

N: How did you like the fried green tomatoes!?
M: Well, they were okay- and I'm glad I tried them, but I like fried summer squash better. [I immediately regret saying this- why I didn't just say something like "they were great!"]



I just worry about the ways in which I might be irritating to people. After reading all this, I see that I do aim for honest communication- and I really can't control how other people react. And it's not like I got a strong reaction.
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  #2  
Old Oct 12, 2019, 09:39 AM
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bpcyclist bpcyclist is offline
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The truth will set you free.
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  #3  
Old Oct 13, 2019, 02:23 PM
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Discombobulated Discombobulated is offline
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Location: UK
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Personally I think your response was fine, if anything better than just "They were great" because you opened up the conversation a little. But then I appreciate honest responses
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  #4  
Old Oct 13, 2019, 02:59 PM
TishaBuv TishaBuv is offline
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I understand your thinking on what you said. By saying the tomatoes were just okay, you didn’t really win favor with her. If you had tweaked it just a bit and said, “They were delicious. I’ve only had friend summer squash before, which I really love.” This would have flattered her, and opened up the conversation, rather than ending it.

You didn’t say anything wrong. Just food for thought (pun intended ) for artful conversation skills in the future.
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Last edited by TishaBuv; Oct 13, 2019 at 03:51 PM.
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