It's not working out there

Well, I have made the decision to move out of my friend's place in the Spring, likely April, May or when my third semester of school is done. I would do it now, but I sure as hell don't want to move again in the dead of winter.

I'm just fed up. My friend (in my opinion) is drinking and smoking pot too much. He also brings his kid down to the basement (where my room is), turns on the radio loud and makes a **** ton of noise. If I did the same thing, I'd be out the door. We always have to be quiet as a church mouse when the kid sleeps. Speaking of which, I'm sure he has behavioural problems, and I'm sure it's more than just the "Terrible Twos."

A few months ago I had to go to the hospital for being overwhelmed with stress and anxiety. I was struggling with school, dealing with wisdom teeth, and the drama where I lived. After that, I pretty much read him and his gf the riot act.

Things got a bit better, but last weekend pissed me off. We usually take turns doing dinner and my turn is usually on Friday, but they had plans that night. Nobody talked to me about doing it Saturday and they just assumed I was making supper that night. 3pm rolls around, and my friend comes down and sees me baking and asks if I'm doing supper, and I said no. His gf, who also has anxiety issues, got in a tizzy and said that nobody is doing dinners anymore and complains nobody helps out, and so on.

My friend (who understood that I was incensed) said that we would draw up a schedule for making dinners and I put my foot down and said I wasn't doing it anymore. Whenever we do it, him and his gf just fight all the time anyways.
I hate the fact that they are comfortable fighting in front of me, that they don't communicate their plans (like planning a poker party on a work night), and that my friend and the kid come and go in the basement when they please and make noise regardless if anyone is resting.

To top everything off, they want to have another kid. They can't even look after this one. They just argue over whose turn it is to look after him. Including me, there are two other people in the house who have anxiety and mental health issues, and I don't think it's healthy for me.

I hope this doesn't threaten the friendship. It takes me a LONG time to forgive someone who screws me over (I often don't forgive people at all). I have to do what's best for me. I'm really disappointed how this all went. I'm not sure when to mention about me moving out. They have been supportive as well, but we're too different. I'm quiet, reserved and like to sleep normal hours. He's a loud, poker playing party animal.

I hope this all works out for the better.

Hey there, I feel your frustration. Living with one person is a lot, I cannot imagine living with a family! Especially when your temperaments are different. I saw that you only plan on moving out April/May? Is there no way of moving elsewhere before then?

I stay at home with my family and it’s also a loud house. My door doesn’t have a key and no one knocks before opening. So I started to initiate Quiet times when if someone came to my room, I would kindly ask them to leave because I am having my own time to just breathe. They started to respect that. Now they just read my facial expression to know if it’s a good time to come in or not haha. But I think you need to try and set some sort of boundary so that you protect your peace of mind. Just because you live with them it doesn’t mean who don’t deserve your own space.

Goodluck and I hope you find a place soon!

I'm sorry that you are struggling right now. I would wait until I found a place to move to and then explain that you are moving for yourself.

Sometimes even the best of friends cant live with each other.