There is someone whom i think has fancied me some time but i could be wrong

I did not fancy her.

Suddenly i do. I asked her for a coffee and she said yes but we did not go yet. Because i want to figure out how to tell her without offending i am not into just friends. i do not want to be caught in the friends trap.

How to make my hopes for relationship clear without being offfensive or sleazy?

She comes up on my fb feed. God help me i am on fb now, it is because of something i did which turned out quite a hit. I am not good on fb just see when she is online i get a notification

[downandlonely]

Well if I were the person you were having coffee with, I'd prefer it if you were upfront and told me you were interested in more than friendship. I appreciate honesty and don't like playing games. But I've been told I'm unusual, so I don't know...

Originally Posted by downandlonely

Well if I were the person you were having coffee with, I'd prefer it if you were upfront and told me you were interested in more than friendship. I appreciate honesty and don't like playing games. But I've been told I'm unusual, so I don't know...

i agree I appreciate honesty and don't like playing games too.

Originally Posted by LonelyMan

How to make my hopes for relationship clear without being offfensive or sleazy?

Ask her what she wants.

I agree with down. I appreciate it when people are upfront about their intentions.

I intend to, the question is how to be subtle about.

Also i have illness i do not want her to know about so that make me wary. she is fit and into physical activities. i would not be able and do not want people to know

[bpcyclist]

I totally agree with the honesty thing, but don't forget, some people are more the 'let's take it one step at a time and just see where this goes' type. Some of them could be scared off if they experience you as coming on too strong. Just something to reflect upon, maybe.

Your personal health history is your own business but just remember, if you two become close, it is definitely going to come out, one way or the other. It always does. So, be careful how you deal with it now. You don't want her feeling you lied to her somewhere down the line because that would be damaging.

In any event, I really hope the coffee goes awesome.

Originally Posted by bpcyclist

I totally agree with the honesty thing, but don't forget, some people are more the 'let's take it one step at a time and just see where this goes' type. Some of them could be scared off if they experience you as coming on too strong. Just something to reflect upon, maybe.

Your personal health history is your own business but just remember, if you two become close, it is definitely going to come out, one way or the other. It always does. So, be careful how you deal with it now. You don't want her feeling you lied to her somewhere down the line because that would be damaging.

In any event, I really hope the coffee goes awesome.

that is what i mean is my concern

In any event, I really hope the coffee goes awesome.

thanks

I still have not asked her out. Sometimes she is very attractive to me on fb but in reality she looks different. Why do people put up photoshopped and filtered images? What is the point of that when they do not look like that really.

Just like my health issues what is the point of pretending to be someone you are not? I do not talk about my health but i do not put up pretend pictures of me climbing mountains when i can't

[Open Eyes]

Some people do photoshop making their pictures look better than they are. However, some people do happen to photograph well looking better than they do in person. Some of the models that look so wonderful in photos for example, are not as attractive in person. This is why when it comes to acting in movies, there is always a screen test involved so the person in charge of selecting who gets certain roles can actually see how a person looks on film. Also, not all very attractive women you meet in person photograph well. Photographs and film tends to add weight to a person too, about 10 pounds so many women who model or are on film tend to look extremely thin in person compared with how they look in pictures and on film.

Originally Posted by Open Eyes

Some people do photoshop making their pictures look better than they are. However, some people do happen to photograph well looking better than they do in person. Some of the models that look so wonderful in photos for example, are not as attractive in person. This is why when it comes to acting in movies, there is always a screen test involved so the person in charge of selecting who gets certain roles can actually see how a person looks on film. Also, not all very attractive women you meet in person photograph well. Photographs and film tends to add weight to a person too, about 10 pounds so many women who model or are on film tend to look extremely thin in person compared with how they look in pictures and on film.

OK I am talking of fb posts where she looks really good. Filters maybe and make up.i am an amateur photographer and I have taken her photo and i have a good camera/and take a decent photo . She doesn't look like on fb. So maybe i am shallow but looks are important to me. i need to find someone attractive before i find them attractive


i am not interested in filters so i do not know much about them. I prefer to learn about photography than click a filter to make my "shot like a pro" as i have seen advertised. I prefer to learn how to shoot like a pro and why it would look like a pro

Also I am too tired mostly to go on a date. I have been very fatigued, a lot which is partly why I did not ask her out

I have given up on her. There is someone I really like in a large store.I fancy her when she wears make up and nice cloths but also make up free in her not flattering uniform and with a hint of a wrinkle