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Member
Member Since Feb 2018
Location: Kansas
Posts: 161
6 44 hugs
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#1
Tonight I zoomed with my parents and my brother and his wife and kids. Turns out one of my nephews (6 years old) is liking math and is "really good with equations." Nothing wrong with them being proud and excited about it, same goes for my parents. Then my mother is like, "Oh, you'll be like grandpa or maybe Iron Man." My father is a physicist, but hey, I have a PhD in biophysics and do a ton of computational and mathematical work. I stayed quiet--whatever--but then like always, a minute later, she sort of remembers me and is like, "Oh, or you'll be like aunt Doro, she also does math."
My mom does this again and again to me. Another time recently, she was talking to me with excitement about some idea she had for a movie, but she said she felt she couldn't write it because it's a controversial topic/story and she doesn't want to endanger my brother's position as a university professor by writing an anti-academia movie. The thing is, I'm also an assistant professor at the university. Only she doesn't give a ***** about that. She only gives a ***** about my brother's job. Another time, we were in the car with my not-yet sister-in-law and my mother started complaining about how she doesn't like it when people put their universities as stickers on their cars. I know why it actually bothers her; because she's dying to brag about the universities she and my father attended. My brother also attended a good one. So she's like, "Oh, I could also put X, Y and Z on our car, but I think you shouldn't brag like that." Then like a minute later, she added: "Oh, and I could put Doro's school too, Doro also went to a good school." Gee, thx mom... Yeah, I didn't attend as great a university as them. If she just wants to brag about X, Y and Z, fine, I'll suck it up. But she just always vaguely throws me in as an afterthought and then is really fake about pretending to give a ***** about what me. It upsets me and is often embarrassing. Now she's texting me, having sensed something bothered me during the zoom but totally incapable of figuring out what. She thinks that I'm upset she and my brother went off on some tangent that I didn't find engaging. I really want to tell her to just F off. |
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Bill3, Open Eyes, TishaBuv, unaluna
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Legendary Wise Elder
Member Since Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 23,179
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#2
I am sorry DoroMona it seems as though people are educated in some ways but very uneducated in other ways. People can have letters after their name but are very insensitive and condescending.
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Member
Member Since Jul 2020
Location: UK
Posts: 368
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#3
Instead of swearing at her, just tell your mother how you feel. Perhaps your mother hasnt noticed this behaviour.
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