I don't see myself getting married

Is it normal that at 28 I don't see myself getting married and not needing/wanting to get married? My brother is getting married, and I've been to other weddings prior, but I don't see myself getting married. I know for sure I won't have children, but marriage just doesn't seem to appeal to me. I won't say no, but with the guy I have a crush on now, I just don't see a wedding happening. It bums me out, but it's not a high priority for me.

I don't want to get married, you're not alone

even if I did, not sure anyone would have me. not exactly a barel of laughs

same with kids. I like them, and think they are adorable as newborns, but I see looking after a kid/ pet/ what ever, as a right that you gain after you've learned to look after yourself

I'm not quite their, so it would be unfair on them

1950 was 70 years ago Do whatever you want.

You are in a good company of many people who never married and many people married or unmarried have no desire to have children

To quote Diane Keton- “just because I am not married it doesn’t mean my life is any less”

There is more to life.

The good thing these days, is that people have a lot more freedom in how to structure their relationships or not to be in a relationship at all. Same with having children. After a long time of thinking I would never get married, I did at the age of 38. It was largely a practical decision for us, being legal next of kin, the inheritance laws in this country, etc.

I never wanted or had kids, and now I'm getting to the age where it's not possible anyways. I have no regrets as far as that. Occasionally people will make rude or judgemental comments, but I've learned to not let that bother me.

A marriage "can" be great...but a divorce is devastating...so, perhaps you are lucky. I am suffering immensely from my divorce.

It is absolutely ok to not have relationships and Marry if you do not want to. Feel free to Live how you prefer by respecting the Rules and not bothering other people. Everyone must follow their own path in their Lives surely. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @LiteraryLark, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!

Who said getting married was 'normal' anyway?

You can do whatever you want to do and if not getting married is what you want, there is nothing wrong with that

Over half over marriages end in divorce. There is nothing wrong with not wanting marriage in your life. You may change your mind one day IF the right person came along and wanted marriage with you. If you do change your mind, be sure it's the right person. Divorce SUCKS. Otherwise, why not just follow what you want and desire out of life. No one says that you have to get married and certainly, one can be perfectly happy without it.

To marry or not to is your choice.No decision is abnormal.The choice should make you happy.A lot of people are happy in their marriages and a lot are happy being single.I agree divorce can get ugly,but sometimes people stay in unhappy marriages for many reasons and suffer.So bottom line make a choice that suits you and be happy.

With that guy you have a crush on, how does he feel about you?

I never got married myself and I'm a little bit beyond middle age. I felt bad about never having someone for a good long time. But in the last few years, I'm feeling OK about it. I don't expect much of anything in the future.

Not wanting to marry is not abnormal, it’s a legitimate choice. It does not mean failure.

Lark, I'm joining with those who say it is your choice. Marriage is not for everyone. Do what's right for you.

It’s not essential to get married, whether you want children or not (I don’t plan on having a husband or children, either).
Marrying someone else doesn’t guarantee anyone a better life than staying single, though some would lead you to believe it does - you can still be lonely, financially poor etc, especially if you happen to end up with someone who is, to put it bluntly, deceptive in some way but hides it well.
People who judge others for not marrying/having children are narrow minded and might even feel threatened in some way by others making different choices than they did. But that’s their problem, not yours.

Neither marriage nor singlehood guarantee happiness.

Many married people are miserable and angry because their marriage is unsatisfactory. Yet many single people are enjoying full and satisfying life. Yet of course many married people are happy and fulfilled.

And for those who think that marriage brings financial stability: many married people, with kids or not, live their life in poverty and find themselves destitute in old age. Either because they relied on their spouses and their spouses didn’t provide what they hoped for or other reasons. Yet many single people build a wonderful life for themselves (and for their children if they have them).

It’s all about how you live your life, either single or married.
You can be happy with either arrangement. Or equally miserable with both.

I think that I can relate to that. I totally agree. Like I said earlier, I never got married and as of now, I'm OK with it. When my sister was in her 40s (and I was in my 30s at that time) she seemed desperate to get married. Out of the blue a guy called her up and asked her for a date. It was someone that she had gone to school with many years ago. They went out for the first time and it didn't seem like much came out of it. But he had asked her out again some time later and she accepted.

As time went on, they saw each other more but it didn't seem serious. And then he just wanted to go out with her and never get married. My sister sought to try to change it. She wanted to get married. To me, I think that the main reason she wanted to get married was so that she could quit her job that she couldn't stand and have children. It turned out that my parents and I didn't like him and saw some red flags. She gave him an ultimatum to get married. He caved in. She had asked my parents and I about getting married to him and we disapproved. But then she asked other people and they told her that she should marry him. And so she ended up marrying him.

They adopted kids in their 50s, just starting out with babies at that time. That was a little more than 30 years ago. And now, after both having great paying jobs and pensions, they are over $100,000 in debt. The kids, now young adults, seem messed up. When my sister talks to me, it sounds like something's wrong, but she would never tell me. It strikes me as a "train wreck" at where she is. So I'm not impressed with what has happened.

A big thank you to everyone who responded. I felt so abnormal to not want marriage or children. Normalcy just isn't my style, and you guys seem to think that's okay!.

I have been married for 30 1/2 years. I should not have. If I had it to do over again I would not. Three of my closest friends are not married and have no intention of it. There is no law saying you have to get married. Live your life the way you see fit.

It used to sound abnormal but not anymore! People used to believe women need a man to function. Nope.

Two of my best girlfriends were never married. It wasn’t really something they planned. But that’s how it played out. They are both busy with hundred of other things, both have successful careers (one just retired), hobbies, friends etc I have several never married female colleagues and they also do lots of different things in life. As I got older I’ve made some new friends and I was pleasantly surprised how many single women are out there.

My daughter is probably your age Lark, or a bit older, she tells me many people her age aren’t considering marriage or kids

Times changed. You do what you want.

Holy Molly how do they get into so much debt. It might be something to do with them making some irresponsible financial decisions rather than decision to get married and to have children. Ton of people marry and raise children and don’t accumulate such debt. If they had well paid jobs and have pensions, they shouldn’t have such debt. Maybe they have some issues like gambling or substance abuse.