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Member Since Sep 2021
Location: Here
Posts: 9
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#1
We've got a baby together 10 months old.
We share a mortgage and bills and I have no money (it's all in the house) and no friends or family close by. Our relationship has been bad for a while now. Communication from his side is non existent. He must think I'm a mind reader. I like to talk and be open, share etc and talk to resolve. He shuts down. I think he is autistic. Tonight had made up my mind where this relationship is now going. We've been so busy with DIY the baby, work and just life etc we've not invested time or effort into us. I suggested making time every day for us. Even 5 mins of an evening before we go to sleep. I said think of how long you spend on social media, we can use that time to be together. He instantly became defensive.. 'i don't even have Facebook,l or Twitter' true, but he does use Instagram a lot. I've just come ony period and told him that I need some extra love and cuddles tonight. I got the opposite. For me I struggle with my period, I get a fair amount of pain and just feel down and sorry for myself. I said let's have a cuddle in bed. I get into bed with a tea and he's on a sports app. He says we can cuddle when I've finished my drink. I put it down and joke and say all done let's cuddle, he continues to be on his phone. We have an argument. He blames me for bringing a drink to bed?! If I didn't have the tea in my hands this wouldn't have happened.. Anyway, he is plain ignoring me now. I feel very alone. I try so hard with our relationship. I suggest ways to communicate, offer him things to say to help each other. He ALWAYS responds with 'stop trying to control me and tell me what to say'. Eg.. I took ages clearing the kitchen. He told me so. I thought it would be done now. I explained it would be nice of him to thank me for what I've done so far, even offer to help! No. He is quick to remind me I'm trying to control his thoughts and words. I give up now. I need to leave. I don't know what to say to him. I have kids. I've no money and no where to go. In UK if anyone can point me to services to contact. He won't leave our house. All replies welcome |
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Bill3, Tonorae, Werewoman, Yaowen
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New Member
Member Since Aug 2020
Location: Az
Posts: 7
3 10 hugs
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#2
I am sorry you are going through this, hugs. I wish I could help with resources but I am not in the UK. Know you have support from us here.
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Legendary
Member Since Jun 2016
Location: Italy
Posts: 11,817
(SuperPoster!)
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#3
So Sorry for what is going on! Please Do not give up! Hugs. i agree with the wise and wonderful Tonorae about wishing i could help more but i also don't live in the UK. i hope someone else will be able to help at least. Perhaps some women shelters may be what you're looking for? Please Do whas is possible. You deserve an happy Life. Perhaps try to suggest couple counseling if he's willing to listen and try also. i hope things will improve really soon for everyone. i apologize if this post isn't really useful but i do want things to improve. Let us know if there's any way we can help obviously. Sending many Safe, warm hugs to BOTH you, @Jessii, your Family, your Friends and ALL of your Loved Ones! Keep fighting and keep rocking NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, OK?!
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