[Blu beli]

Every time my husband gets mad. When he gets angry. He says he wants to separate and not be together. Should go paths. He says he loves me but wants to separate

Possible trigger:

today he said he hopes I die.

That's awful. He says later on that day or the next day he doesn't mean anything he says and that he's mad

[Open Eyes]

He is using emotional blackmail on you. Look it up and read about it.

[SprinkL3]

That's a horrible thing for your husband to say to you! I'm so sorry you are experiencing such emotional traumas! Do you have a T to help you with this? Can you afford to separate and divorce? It sounds like a very abusive relationship.

[Rive.]

If he loved you, he would not treat you like that.

I would be the one to leave his sorry arse with such manipulation.

[Time to Rise]

I had a very close friend who went through the same thing with her spouse. She decided to present her divorce plan to him and when he realized he couldn't hold her emotionally hostage with his threats he stopped. Now, keep in mind that their marriage is not healthy, but she started figuring out what she would do if divorce happened and she feels a lot more in control of her future, with or without him.
Bottom line, you can't change his behavior, but you can set up protection and plans for your reaction to it and take your future out of his control.

[Have Hope]

This is a part of emotional abuse - to constantly threaten to want to separate and then to say what he did to you? That's abusive. I would take him up on a separation at this stage. It is not healthy.

[SprinkL3]

Here are a few U.S. resources, if you need help leaving an abusive relationship:

Domestic Violence Support (The Hotline)

Center for Family Justice

Help Guide

Victim Connect

National Center for Victims of Crime

The U.S. Department of Justice re: Domestic Violence

Here are resources for military families and veterans:

Military One Source re: Military Domestic Abuse

Military One Source - How to Find Help

Military One Source - Domestic Abuse Victim Assistance

Military One Source - Domestic Abuse Military Reporting Options

RAINN - Military Sexual Trauma

U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs - Intimate Partner Violence

Here are additional resources (listed from the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs - but for both civilians and military veterans):

Futures Without Violence

National Center on Domestic and Sexual Violence

Office on Violence Against Women (U.S. Department of Justice) - OCTOBER IS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AWARENESS MONTH

Empower - Freedom from Domestic Abuse (through Allstate)