[BigBubba]

I'm sorry if this sounds bad. I don't have bad intensions. I'm just curious of what you think.

I'm the guy (27). I meet this girl couple days ago when I was running workshops with a group of teenagers at a summer camp. She seemed very interested in me as she walked up to me several times privately and I have to say she made quite an impression on me despite her age.

I'm wondering if it would be appropiate for me to talk to her outside the workshops. I'm not a teacher, the worshops were related to my profession (film and photography). I don't want to "score" her or anything like that, honest to God. I know she's young and I would be very careful while interacting with her. She's just got me curious and interested. I would like to talk to her longer, see what she's like with no real expectations or anything. Though she is attractive IMO, I admit it.

What do you guys think about this situation?

[divine1966]

She is of legal age (make sure she is, if she is in a summer camp she might be not 18), so no harm in talking to her.

[unaluna]

No. You are in a POSITION of teacher, even if you arent technically a teacher. During the class you were in a position of power and responsibility.

It's a summer camp for teenagers. You have a parental responsibility. That includes not seducing a student. College professors have students over the age of 18, it is still against policy.

Its the same reasoning behind drs and their patients, or church clergy and members. Its a power position and therefore unequal and creepy.

[Have Hope]

I would say it's inappropriate. You were in charge of these workshops, in a leadership role, even if you were not a teacher. There should be a policy against this. And 18 is still very young.

[BigBubba]

Originally Posted by unaluna

No. You are in a POSITION of teacher, even if you arent technically a teacher. During the class you were in a position of power and responsibility.

It's a summer camp for teenagers. You have a parental responsibility. That includes not seducing a student. College professors have students over the age of 18, it is still against policy.

Its the same reasoning behind drs and their patients, or church clergy and members. Its a power position and therefore unequal and creepy.

I'm aware of that. I though of doing something once the worshops are 100% over and done. Then we're just both civilians.

[BigBubba]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

I would say it's inappropriate. You were in charge of these workshops, in a leadership role, even if you were not a teacher. There should be a policy against this. And 18 is still very young.

Would it still be inappropriate once he worshops are over and I don't work with these people in any way, shape or form?

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by BigBubba

Would it still be inappropriate once he worshops are over and I don't work with these people in any way, shape or form?

Yes, to me it would be. It's the same thing as a professor who seduces a student, but in the summertime during summer break after classes have ended. You still were in a leadership position, a position of respect, authority and power, over the 18 year old girl.

Why not date people of your own age, or who are at least over the age of 21? Just because this 18-year old girl showed interest, it does not mean that you need to reciprocate.

This is often the case between young girls and older guys. Older guys are very attractive to young girls. This girl is still a teenager - you are nearing 30 years of age.

[BigBubba]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

Yes, to me it would be. It's the same thing as a professor who seduces a student, but in the summertime during summer break after classes have ended. You still were in a leadership position, a position of respect, authority and power, over the 18 year old girl.

I see your point, but we're not coming back once the summer time is over. Those worshops were a one-time thing. Once it's done, I'm not her teacher and I will never be.

Originally Posted by Have Hope

This is often the case between young girls and older guys. Older guys are very attractive to young girls. This girl is still a teenager - you are nearing 30 years of age.

I'm 27, not 47 and I personallly I don't feel like 18-19yo girls are too young for me. I don't have bad intensions. I won't harm her or manipulate her and I know how young she is and that I have to be the smart one.

[unaluna]

Originally Posted by BigBubba

Once it's done, I'm not her teacher and I will never be.

But you ALWAYS will have been. You cant change the past.

I won't harm her or manipulate her and I know how young she is and that I have to be the smart one.

That bolded statement is already controlling. You are already discounting her and exalting yourself. Youre admitting you are taking more power.

If she is in a summer camp, does that mean she is returning to high school in the fall, not college? I dont think she was sent there by her parents with the intent of finding a husband AMONG THE STAFF.

[BigBubba]

Originally Posted by unaluna

That bolded statement is already controlling. You are already discounting her and exalting yourself. Youre admitting you are taking more power.

By saying "I have to be the smart one" I meant I won't use my life expierence and emotional knowledge to take advantage of her.

[BigBubba]

Originally Posted by unaluna

If she is in a summer camp, does that mean she is returning to high school in the fall, not college? I dont think she was sent there by her parents with the intent of finding a husband AMONG THE STAFF.

Jesus Christ a husband? All I'm thinking about for now is a casual coffee and talk.

[Have Hope]

Originally Posted by BigBubba

I see your point, but we're not coming back once the summer time is over. Those worshops were a one-time thing. Once it's done, I'm not her teacher and I will never be.


I'm 27, not 47 and I personallly I don't feel like 18-19yo girls are too young for me. I don't have bad intensions. I won't harm her or manipulate her and I know how young she is and that I have to be the smart one.

You seem headstrong on moving forward with this and are going to do it anyways, so why ask for opinions if you’re going to argue against the advice given? Just sayin’.

[BigBubba]

Originally Posted by Have Hope

You seem headstrong on moving forward with this so why ask for opinions if you’re going to argue against the advice given?

I just want to make sure you have the whole picture of my point of view. I dunno what to do.

[MuddyBoots]

Half your age + 7

[Molinit]

Better leave that girl alone - it is ABSOLUTELY INAPPROPRIATE and you have NOTHING in common with her.

You are in a teacher "role." Respect that.

If that were my daughter and there was a 27-year-old man after her, there would be a very scared and injured 27-year-old man by the time my family and I got done with him.

You, at your age, should have no interest whatsoever in a teenager, of age or not. It's disturbing. Why aren't you dealing with women your own age?

[BigBubba]

Molinit thanks for your input, but I have to say...

Originally Posted by Molinit

If that were my daughter and there was a 27-year-old man after her, there would be a very scared and injured 27-year-old man by the time my family and I got done with him.

What is that? lol You know you would end up in prison, right? If the girl is 18, I'm not breaking any laws by approaching her.

[Molinit]

Originally Posted by BigBubba

Jesus Christ a husband? All I'm thinking about for now is a casual coffee and talk.

Take a 27-year-old woman out for coffee.

[BigBubba]

Originally Posted by Molinit

You, at your age, should have no interest whatsoever in a teenager, of age or not. It's disturbing. Why aren't you dealing with women your own age?

I usually do, that's why I started this thread. Its kinda new for me to get interested in someone her age.

[Molinit]

Originally Posted by BigBubba

Molinit thanks for your input, but I have to say...

What is that? lol You know you would end up in prison, right? If the girl is 18, I'm not breaking any laws by approaching her.

You have no business with an 18-year-old and I don't call the police. Most people handle things like this themselves. It's called street justice.

Watch yourself, she might have a family who doesn't call the cops either.

[BigBubba]

Originally Posted by Molinit

Most people handle things like this themselves. It's called street justice.

Watch yourself, she might have a family who doesn't call the cops either.

LOL what is this, a mafia? I don't respond to threats kindly in real life. You may have a point about not pursuing this idea (to talk to her), but this whole hitman thing is ridiciulous. If you touched me, I would send you to jail in no time.