advertisement
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
TishaBuv
Wise Elder
 
TishaBuv's Avatar
TishaBuv took a wrong turn in Albuquerque
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 9,600 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,610 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 01, 2022 at 07:50 AM
  #61
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes View Post
It sounds like your husbandís ego was damaged by what he experienced at his job and he was no longer the center of attention with you when you had your child.

Sometimes what you described creates a shut down that a man is not even aware of. Men can have a hard time with emotions, they hate feeling vulnerable. Most men are not nurtured where they are allowed to have emotions and be ok with feeling. Instead they tend to be encouraged to man up and ignore their feelings. This tends to make them pull away from a womanís emotional needs because it makes them uncomfortable.

One of the things that concerns me is how quickly people use the label narcissist because they want that black and white answer to why there are challenges in a relationship. There tends to be a lot of pressure on men to fill certain expectations.
He was raised by parents who showed little emotion. He made it his style to show no emotion in his job for self preservation. Although he likes humor and can lol, he doesnít show empathic emotion much.

The relationship was a power imbalance. He was the boss and I the worker. He wasnít mean and demanding about that. It was an unspoken agreement. I picked up on his unspoken wants and did it because I wanted the relationship, knew if I didnít heíd find someone else who would. But I did want it to feel real and satisfying to me, to my soul. I asked for too much. It became an obsession which turned into me having weekly meltdown episodes.

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote

advertisement
TishaBuv
Wise Elder
 
TishaBuv's Avatar
TishaBuv took a wrong turn in Albuquerque
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 9,600 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,610 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 01, 2022 at 07:57 AM
  #62
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by unaluna View Post
Well you know in therapy they say you cannot change the other person, you can only change yourself. And in one of your recent posts, you said you engage in some kind of self-harming behavior. Maybe that is the place to start - changing that behavior. Cuz otherwise, you seem to be putting the blame / responsibility for your behavior on him. I see 1. You ask 2. He fails 3. You self-harm.

Remember the Serenity Prayer: Grant me the serenity to accept the things i cannot change, the courage to change the things i can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Or the alternate version: Grant me the coffee to change the things i can, and the wine to accept the things i cant change.
CoDA is a 12 step program with the Serenity Prayer, just like AA. Yeah, I am an addict. I need to make amends to everyone I hurt. To all here, I am sorry for my obsessive whining about my situation that is the trigger for my misery. I am the problem and I need a 12 step program for healing.

My sister told me yesterday that our mother would complain to her about how I kept crying to our mother about my unhappiness with my husband. Sister said Mom was annoyed that I kept upsetting HER. This is how my FOO helped me get out of a bad, dangerous, harmful situation- they dissed me behind my back.

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
TishaBuv
Wise Elder
 
TishaBuv's Avatar
TishaBuv took a wrong turn in Albuquerque
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 9,600 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,610 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 01, 2022 at 08:23 AM
  #63
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Have Hope View Post
Hello Tisha! I mentioned this on your other thread, but it's great to have you back!

A question I pose to you is this: Is he different in public and with his family and friends than he is with you? Does he show you one side and the public a far better & more respectful side? If he does, and if he seems to have one personality that is great and for the public, and another that is hurtful but only behind closed doors and with you, then you know for certain that you are dealing with an abuser. If he harms other people too, friends or his family members, then it's not just exclusive behavior with you and it may be more a part of his personality and like you said, a cognitive distortion of sorts. However, abusers CAN control how they behave and they save all of their abusive behaviors for their victims at home, behind closed doors. And then they turn it off like a switch when they are in public or with their friends and then they turn on the charm. You see the charming side of them come out.

And yes, I've seen Groundhog Day! Love that movie! And yes, I understand - you've been in this position many times and for a long time now - over and over again, the pattern repeats itself.

Your trigger is your body and spirit telling you that you do not like the behaviors you are experiencing. The behaviors are harmful to you, they hurt you and upset you - those feelings are 100% valid. Sometimes, it's impossible to change how we react, but we can change how we respond to our emotional reactions and to others when we are triggered. This we CAN control.

And no, you should not have to put up with such an unfulfilling relationship. There's so much happiness that you could have, that this relationship is not providing you with.

That's my two cents for right now.
Great questions!
Neither of us are different or only respectful in public, or with other people. He is extremely polite. It is this problem with intimacy that I am the one having. I am the origin of the problem because I donít feel right about it, it doesnít feel right because he acts so strange, vacant. The whole thing has been off the rails. It is a routine of a cycle of abuse, emotional abuse as sexual function.

1. Tension builds. We both know it is looming that sex will be approached. It is anxiety provoking. Anyone would be anxious in this repetitive cycle.
2. It falls flat. Either he does nothing, or I do nothing, or he does something horribly awkward and anxious or I just have an anxious outburst.
3. I get dysregulated upset. Crying, disappointed, angry, wanting to end dysfunctional relationship
4. I sometimes self medicate. In the past this was worse, to the point of dangerous. He contributed to it, still does, but I wonít let it get worse. He was pushing it to be worse, more unhealthy for me. It is me who stopped myself from SH, kept it non addictive, non lethal.
5. Then, in the past, this hasnít happened for a long time now, he suddenly was passionate with no anxiety, no issues. But typically, it is me who just goes and initiates sex. Itís fine. We both feel good.
6. I am optimistic our problem will improve moving forward. Maybe heís learned, as he said he did. But back to step 1 we go.

Meanwhile, life outside of this behind closed doors abuse is seemingly normal.

Over our years together, he also didnít have my back to defend me the few times that ever happened to me. He betrayed me in that way one time where he chose someone over me who was extremely hurtful to me. He also was financially abusive at one point for several years. It wasnít that he wasnít letting me spend any money or anything like that. It was him passive aggressively asserting control by withholding it in a big way, not cool at all to me, which I protested constantly. To which he said he would stop, but then just didnít, stonewalled. He did this while we were ďtrying to fixĒ our intimacy issue. These were very sore issues for me of some things that he did that were rotten to me. But that was it over our 30 year marriage. For the most part he is a nice person, who does nothing outright harmful, hateful. Except the man watched me cry hysterically and rant in anger at him and just kept doing it to me and watching me meltdown!

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Have Hope, Open Eyes
TishaBuv
Wise Elder
 
TishaBuv's Avatar
TishaBuv took a wrong turn in Albuquerque
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 9,600 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,610 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 01, 2022 at 08:38 AM
  #64
 
Oh, and he tortured me with holidays by never understanding what to do or just doing something for me. This was also a chronic misunderstanding that was off the tracks. But, he has gotten better this year. All I had asked was the most simple expectation from him, but he habitually disappointed. Then he would go far out of his way to do something special, like a really nice, unique gift this one year or two. So, this was a source of struggle with us, too. It wasnít me being a demanding person impossible to please. It was him just not simply doing the expected actions, the typical, nice, normally done actions.

And this struggle, holidays, also caused me the crying meltdowns.

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Open Eyes
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 22,096 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
20.4k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 01, 2022 at 01:49 PM
  #65
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv View Post
He was raised by parents who showed little emotion. He made it his style to show no emotion in his job for self preservation. Although he likes humor and can lol, he doesnít show empathic emotion much.

The relationship was a power imbalance. He was the boss and I the worker. He wasnít mean and demanding about that. It was an unspoken agreement. I picked up on his unspoken wants and did it because I wanted the relationship, knew if I didnít heíd find someone else who would. But I did want it to feel real and satisfying to me, to my soul. I asked for too much. It became an obsession which turned into me having weekly meltdown episodes.
This is his upbringing and why he struggles to understand your emotional needs. Itís not a narcissistic intentional but more in lack of understanding that can at times lead to him withdrawing. Yet mostly due to a personal discomfort then of malice. How old is he?
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
TishaBuv
Have Hope
Wise Elder
 
Have Hope's Avatar
Have Hope has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 7,558 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
3,095 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 02, 2022 at 06:18 AM
  #66
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv View Post
Great questions!
Neither of us are different or only respectful in public, or with other people. He is extremely polite. It is this problem with intimacy that I am the one having. I am the origin of the problem because I donít feel right about it, it doesnít feel right because he acts so strange, vacant. The whole thing has been off the rails. It is a routine of a cycle of abuse, emotional abuse as sexual function.

1. Tension builds. We both know it is looming that sex will be approached. It is anxiety provoking. Anyone would be anxious in this repetitive cycle.
2. It falls flat. Either he does nothing, or I do nothing, or he does something horribly awkward and anxious or I just have an anxious outburst.
3. I get dysregulated upset. Crying, disappointed, angry, wanting to end dysfunctional relationship
4. I sometimes self medicate. In the past this was worse, to the point of dangerous. He contributed to it, still does, but I wonít let it get worse. He was pushing it to be worse, more unhealthy for me. It is me who stopped myself from SH, kept it non addictive, non lethal.
5. Then, in the past, this hasnít happened for a long time now, he suddenly was passionate with no anxiety, no issues. But typically, it is me who just goes and initiates sex. Itís fine. We both feel good.
6. I am optimistic our problem will improve moving forward. Maybe heís learned, as he said he did. But back to step 1 we go.

Meanwhile, life outside of this behind closed doors abuse is seemingly normal.

Over our years together, he also didnít have my back to defend me the few times that ever happened to me. He betrayed me in that way one time where he chose someone over me who was extremely hurtful to me. He also was financially abusive at one point for several years. It wasnít that he wasnít letting me spend any money or anything like that. It was him passive aggressively asserting control by withholding it in a big way, not cool at all to me, which I protested constantly. To which he said he would stop, but then just didnít, stonewalled. He did this while we were ďtrying to fixĒ our intimacy issue. These were very sore issues for me of some things that he did that were rotten to me. But that was it over our 30 year marriage. For the most part he is a nice person, who does nothing outright harmful, hateful. Except the man watched me cry hysterically and rant in anger at him and just kept doing it to me and watching me meltdown!
Thanks for more of the specifics, TIsha.

Unfortunately, I don't see the issues changing or improving.

You have been trying to make this better for years now, and the cycle hasn't improved. You've tried therapy, and that hasn't changed anything So, what's next?

Do you still love him? And what do you love about him? What does he do that works well for you? Do the negatives outweigh the positives, or do the positives outweigh the negatives? You don't have to answer, I am just asking you these questions to help you think about it.

Many of the things you describe are bothersome and to me are unacceptable. I especially don't like that he didn't have your back, that he has encouraged you to self harm, that he continues on with his antics while you're having a meltdown, that he abused you financially, all of his gaslighting, and that he won't lift a finger to make romantic efforts when you ask him to.

I can only imagine how you must feel having dealt with all of this.

__________________
"Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination"

~4 Non Blondes
Have Hope is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
TishaBuv
Have Hope
Wise Elder
 
Have Hope's Avatar
Have Hope has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 7,558 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
3,095 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 05, 2022 at 05:53 PM
  #67
 
How you doing @TishaBuv?

__________________
"Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination"

~4 Non Blondes
Have Hope is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Stronglady1
Member
Stronglady1 has no updates.
 
Member Since: Sep 2022
Location: MI
Posts: 109
Old Dec 06, 2022 at 10:21 PM
  #68
 
It has been with my boyfriend's youngest brother.First time I met his family,he reacted asking him why he was dating a midget which I find this word 100% offensive since it is also offensive to people with dwarfism.Boyfriend's parents,younger sister and older brother including my boyfriend were not too happy with him and were on my side.He does not understand anything about my pituritary dwarfism.
Stronglady1 is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
TishaBuv, unaluna
TishaBuv
Wise Elder
 
TishaBuv's Avatar
TishaBuv took a wrong turn in Albuquerque
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 9,600 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,610 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 07, 2022 at 09:47 AM
  #69
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Have Hope View Post
How you doing @TishaBuv?
Thanks for asking, HH.

Iím a lost fart in a windstorm.

Actually, that was an expression my sister S made up, and a running joke in our family.

My husband and I are hunkered down in an apartment, basically just watching constant tv. The pandemic didnít help. I need to figure out something to do with myself to individuate.

An opportunity has just arisen. My son, who is about to have a baby, asked if we would be willing to baby sit a few days a week so they both can work. He texted that question to my h, who had texted him to ask if she was in labor yet. My hís attitude is one of feeling put upon, not wanting to baby sit. He didnít want to ďbaby sitĒ his own kids. And yes, he did call it ďbaby sitĒ.

He tried to involve me in the text, and I told him I would speak to my son and DIL at a later time myself.

Iím actually very happy about the idea, that they asked, that they want my involvement, that I can have involvement with my son and grandchild. I am also seeing this as an opportunity to individuate from my husband. I was thinking I could get a job, and this could essentially be a job for me.

I plan to discuss it with them to see what they have in mind. I am being very cautions because I do not want anything to become problematic. The last thing I want is a rift with them.

Iím imagining I would be spending time in their house with the baby. I would like to do this without my husband being there. He could stay home or do whatever he wants and I could be over there.

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Have Hope, unaluna
divine1966
Legendary Wise Elder
 
divine1966's Avatar
divine1966 Tired!!!
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 20,424 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,166 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 07, 2022 at 10:19 AM
  #70
 
Couple days a week is a great plan. My former, now retired, coworker watches her grand babies one or two days a week. She loves it. Anything more than few days would be too much. Itís exciting.

We babysit our 7 year old granddaughter (she is my step but we donít call it that) every other weekend. My stepdaughter is single mom and has extra job on the weekends. Itís fun. My grandson lives way too far to babysit regularly. I do when I travel to them.

But otherwise if that doesnít work, part time job is a good idea too. Sitting home together is great here and there. All day every day might not be best.

Hope you come with something. Canít wait to hear when the baby is born. Is it a boy?
divine1966 is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
TishaBuv
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 22,096 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
20.4k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 07, 2022 at 12:22 PM
  #71
 
Itís wonderful that your son and daughter in law want you involved with your new grandchild.
I think itís best to wait until after the baby is born and the mother has had time to adjust to being a new mother. It is not unusual for a new mother to get very possessive and protective once the birth has taken place. Itís best not to make work plans until mother has had adequate time being a new mom. Itís something one has to experience to understand.

It has been proven that mother child bonding is a very important part of healthy development in a baby. Itís NOW recognized through a great deal of study that early bonding is very important so this is not just my personal opinion.

The best way to handle this is to respond with showing respect for the mother and that you would rather move slowly based on her comfort level. Men donít understand this, itís not anything they experience first hand.

Allow her to have the say and proceed very carefully and gradually. If the wife is happy your son will be happy 😉

Last edited by Open Eyes; Dec 07, 2022 at 12:51 PM..
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
TishaBuv
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 22,096 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
20.4k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 07, 2022 at 01:03 PM
  #72
 
Does your daughter in law plan on breast feeding? I recently read how they have learned how breast feeding actually reduces the risk of breast cancer. I now wish I had saved that article.
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
TishaBuv
Wise Elder
 
TishaBuv's Avatar
TishaBuv took a wrong turn in Albuquerque
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 9,600 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,610 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 08, 2022 at 08:14 AM
  #73
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes View Post
Does your daughter in law plan on breast feeding? I recently read how they have learned how breast feeding actually reduces the risk of breast cancer. I now wish I had saved that article.
Sheís going to breastfeed, but I havenít discussed anything much about it with her. I know they are giving her 3 months maternity leave, which is great.

Iím glad you were all supportive of the idea of me watching the baby.

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
TishaBuv
Wise Elder
 
TishaBuv's Avatar
TishaBuv took a wrong turn in Albuquerque
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 9,600 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,610 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 08, 2022 at 08:16 AM
  #74
 
More tears with the lack, the emptiness from him this morning. But I suppress the anger, frustration. No more of that from me, not a good look.

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
Open Eyes
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 22,096 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
20.4k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 08, 2022 at 03:36 PM
  #75
 
Does your husband have any hobbies? Is he active with anything?
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Have Hope
Wise Elder
 
Have Hope's Avatar
Have Hope has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 7,558 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
3,095 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 08, 2022 at 05:48 PM
  #76
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv View Post
Thanks for asking, HH.

Iím a lost fart in a windstorm.

Actually, that was an expression my sister S made up, and a running joke in our family.

My husband and I are hunkered down in an apartment, basically just watching constant tv. The pandemic didnít help. I need to figure out something to do with myself to individuate.

An opportunity has just arisen. My son, who is about to have a baby, asked if we would be willing to baby sit a few days a week so they both can work. He texted that question to my h, who had texted him to ask if she was in labor yet. My hís attitude is one of feeling put upon, not wanting to baby sit. He didnít want to ďbaby sitĒ his own kids. And yes, he did call it ďbaby sitĒ.

He tried to involve me in the text, and I told him I would speak to my son and DIL at a later time myself.

Iím actually very happy about the idea, that they asked, that they want my involvement, that I can have involvement with my son and grandchild. I am also seeing this as an opportunity to individuate from my husband. I was thinking I could get a job, and this could essentially be a job for me.

I plan to discuss it with them to see what they have in mind. I am being very cautions because I do not want anything to become problematic. The last thing I want is a rift with them.

Iím imagining I would be spending time in their house with the baby. I would like to do this without my husband being there. He could stay home or do whatever he wants and I could be over there.
This sounds really good, and I think it would be highly beneficial for you! Doing something that you enjoy, getting out of the house and helping with childcare all sounds great!! Go for it.

__________________
"Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination"

~4 Non Blondes
Have Hope is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
TishaBuv
Have Hope
Wise Elder
 
Have Hope's Avatar
Have Hope has no updates.
 
Member Since: Dec 2017
Location: Eastern, USA
Posts: 7,558 (SuperPoster!)
5 yr Member
3,095 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 08, 2022 at 05:49 PM
  #77
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by TishaBuv View Post
More tears with the lack, the emptiness from him this morning. But I suppress the anger, frustration. No more of that from me, not a good look.

__________________
"Twenty-five years and my life is still trying to get up that great big hill of hope for a destination"

~4 Non Blondes
Have Hope is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Hugs from:
TishaBuv
TishaBuv
Wise Elder
 
TishaBuv's Avatar
TishaBuv took a wrong turn in Albuquerque
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 9,600 (SuperPoster!)
8 yr Member
1,610 hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 09, 2022 at 07:18 AM
  #78
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by Open Eyes View Post
Does your husband have any hobbies? Is he active with anything?
We do a lot of walking now.

He wanted to and started to be a collector. I put a stop to that because he went overboard. We still have those collections in storage, needing to be sold. Heís not motivated to do that. So, essentially, itís clutter.

I have an aversion to collecting and clutter because my parents are extreme about being nearly hoarders with these things, too. So, that hobby of his was disturbing to me. I am severely allergic to dust. The clutter just collects dust and clogs up the room.

When we lived in our house, he constantly cluttered every counter and table surface with stuff. Things would pile up so bad, you couldnít go in a room. I didnít even fight with him about that. Finally, Iíd go deal with it all myself, which heíd get mad about because I moved his stuff.

Now that weíre in such a small apartment, he has no where to do this. Still, in every tiny spot there is a surface, he clutters it up. But, at least, it canít get as bad now.

He opens a cabinet, he doesnít close it. He uses an item, he doesnít put it away. I have lived with this annoying behavior, and I do not fight with him about this.

Back to hobbiesÖ he rarely goes with a male friend to do a driving experience with cars or another experience with boy toys (ashamed to mention what). It is more that these friends are the hobbyists of these things and he goes along. This only happened once or twice. He is not very close with any of the friends.

I have nothing in common with him in these interests.

Nope, other than that he just watches tv. I never watched a lot of tv before I met him. I was always with friends, doing things, out around town. But this is all I do now too. No real hobbies for me, either. I am very boring.

__________________
"And don't say it hasn't been a little slice of heaven, 'cause it hasn't!"
. About Me--T
TishaBuv is offline   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
Open Eyes
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Open Eyes's Avatar
Open Eyes Not a Unicorn, just another horse
 
Member Since: Mar 2011
Location: Northeast USA
Posts: 22,096 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
20.4k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 09, 2022 at 08:36 AM
  #79
 
OMG @TishaBuv you are describing my husband to a T. Ugh, I took pictures to show my therapist how bad he can get.

I am certain this is connected to my husbands ADHD/dyslexia. It drives me crazy.
Open Eyes is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
TishaBuv
unaluna
Elder Harridan x-hankster
 
unaluna's Avatar
unaluna The UNA in Florida - Please, dont @mention me?Thanks!
 
Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 38,177 (SuperPoster!)
10 yr Member
62.2k hugs
given
PC PoohBah!
Old Dec 09, 2022 at 08:39 AM
  #80
 
Hoarding is OCD, altho now they are saying it is its own thing.
unaluna is online now   Reply With QuoteReply With Quote
 
Thanks for this!
TishaBuv
All times are GMT -5. The time now is 10:14 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2023, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.



 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent community, overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.